Family Life Update March 2019

The first quarter of the year has gone super fast and we’ve been up to quite a lot. I asked Evangeline what she thought we had done so far this year and her response has been “booking holidays” – we’ve actually only booked two but we are all very excited about both of them! Now the long wait for both begins. Our first trip will be in the Summer and our third time visiting Isle of Wight. Our second is further along in December 2020 when we will be taking our first cruise together as a family of four.

Evangeline

This first quarter of the year has mostly been dominated by Evangeline changing junior schools and she has now spent almost eight weeks in her new school. We have her first parent’s evening next week to catch up with her teacher about her progress but so far the feedback from Evie personally has been really positive. She seems to be enjoying school a lot and it’s helping her behaviour at home a little – although that is still very much a work in progress.

For a very long time, since she was around two years old, I have suspected Evie might have ADHD. Despite my concerns, these have never been echoed at school as she has always been fairly well behaved there bar a few incidents. However, at home and with family members certain quirks have become much more noticeable which has brought this niggle further to the forefront of my mind. I’ve spoken to some friends about her behaviour for some support.

Evangeline is non stop. It’s very hard to actually show that to people without them really getting to know her but she exhausts people, except herself. She is almost always wired from the moment she wakes up until she finally falls asleep. She sleeps very, very deeply and will sometimes lay in but she does not sleep for long periods of time and often is still awake later than I am. No amount of bath, book, bed or similar routine has ever changed this. She never walks, she is always running, dancing and twirling her way around. She struggles to remember to follow instructions and has very little spacial awareness. She struggles to remember her morning and evening routines despite doing the same thing monday to friday since she started reception in 2015. She has been the same really for the last eight years with her energy levels. Nothing wears her out, we can walk for miles and whilst she hates it, she’s very rarely tired by large amounts of physical activity.

She can not focus on one thing at a time and is constantly multitasking. I think she would benefit from some fidget toys as she always wants to keep her hands busy and she can not do anything in silence. Even when playing on her tablet she is frequently flipping between tv shows and games because she struggles to concentrate on just one thing. She is so clumsy because she very rarely looks where she is going and I do not think she has ever sat down and watched a film the entire way through. She simply can not stop moving or sit still.

We are now reassessing a lot of things with her and trying to restrict her sugar intake, get her moving more, drinking more water and having to change how we discipline her. Mainly because I did not expect an eight year old to be as immature as she is. Evangeline is very naive and does not really handle any form of responsibility well. She needs supervision and monitoring and does not seem to perceive danger as well as other children her age. I struggle because when I was 8 I was a very different child and part of me has not really understood why she would be so different to me. We are getting there though and still trying to find our feet as a family of four.

8 year old sister and 6 month old brother sat together on red sofa

Felix

Felix is an amazing baby. The bond he and Evangeline have is so beautiful to see, she is, with all her energy, an excellent entertainer for him. Felix has gone from the start of the year to just coming out of that newborn stage to being a shouty rolling machine. The difference in him from the start of the year to now is really astounding. He will be officially six months old on 4th April and in the last month particularly his physical development has come on in leaps and bounds. I’ll go into more detail during his six month update. I can not wait to see what the next six months will bring!

Adam

Adam has one more week left of Semester 2 and then is officially on his Easter Holiday break. He has two assignments to finish and hand in over his time off, an oral exam and assignment due next week and then his first year of University is done. I am really, really excited about having him home on his days off as his days at University have been a bit of a juggle with his job and two kids, but, it’s been worth it.

He will be sorting out his second year student finance shortly and has just chosen his modules for his second year. He’s done really well with a few assignments being so close to getting a 1st and I can not see how he could not pass the year unless his next four assignments are really terrible. I think he feels a bit more confident about year two as he’s been able to pick modules he wants to learn about.

He has been having regular driving lessons since August last year in an Automatic for an Automatic only license and now feels really confident about driving. He’s been doing research on what car he wants to buy and I’ve helped him get some insurance quotes so we can budget a car into our lives – something I have never actually had to do. It feels very strange thinking that we will be a driving family soon. He’s very nearly test ready so I will hopefully be able to share that news with everyone in the next couple of months. Even though he will be paying out monthly for a car, it will be great to take the burden of the cost of driving lessons off his shoulders. I’m just putting a list of ‘car admin’ things together but really all I am thinking about is what extended rear facing car seat we should buy for Felix and whether we actually need a car seat for Evie or not because the last time I checked her height she was about 5cm away from needing one. I’ve not been in a car when Adam has been driving so it will be really strange sitting in the passenger seat of our car for the first time.

He has been at his now current I suppose job for almost six months now on a four nights on, four off basis. The best part is having him home four days in a row which helps a lot with school runs and Felix. It also means when we go on Holiday in July he only has to take one day off which is a bonus. There are a lot of good points to the job and I’m sure it will be a bit easier outside of the semester when he’s not juggling classes, work and family all in one go!

Me

I have been recommended to start with the Our Path journey to help with weight loss and rethinking my unhealthy eating habits. I’m looking into body positive and intuitive eating books and podcasts. Our new leisure centre is going to be up and running soon so I’m going to look into taking the kids swimming in the new pool. I’ve not been very inspired to write much lately on both blogs because I’ve felt quite down about myself and it’s been hard being a parent of two with a partner that is so busy. I do need to try and get a bit more structure to my day and I’m hoping that will change in the coming months when Adam’s first year of Uni is done and dusted.

I’m very excited about our holiday and our debt free plan is really coming together. I’m hoping to put together and evaluation and update next month to see our debt difference with the bigger payments we’ve been making. I feel a lot better about our financial future but it’s been tough at times having to commit to the payments when I’ve wanted to buy something else but I’m holding back and trying to save.

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