mother of daughters

The Mother of a Five (and a half) Year Old

Kat and Mini KatMini Kat is now half way through Reception at school. I remember last Summer with a grimace. When your child is destined to be one of the oldest in her school year, the summer before may be a little challenging, at least it was for us. For every great moment there was a tough one. We tried to fit a lot in over the Summer, I was back working from home so I had the time to take Mini Kat out and we’d booked a week holiday in Blackpool as well as arranged glamping at Warwick Castle and a trip to visit friends in Cardiff. I’d also booked Mini Kat onto a weeks long swimming crash course to help her burn off some energy and help her confidence with swimming. Team that up with visits to the park and seeing family as well as two weeks away with her Dad you’d think she’d be happy. But no. Part of me thinks it was all just a bit much for her, she got excited and then very overwhelmed and perhaps in her mind the idea of going to school was scary, although when we talked about it she seemed excited.

When she started school she was exactly the same way she had been when she’d started nursery those few years ago. There were no tears, no complaints and she went in every day happy and came out happy. She seemed to really being enjoying school. Her first parents evening after half term showed that it was true. She was a polite girl who was making friends and enjoyed her time there. She really began to get an understanding of time aswell, asking when it would be the weekend (I get two days off, don’t I mummy?) and how many days she would be at school for. When half term came around she was not as difficult as she had been during the Summer holidays. She was excited to go back to school and start working on her Christmas projects.

The build up to Christmas was fantastic. She was so exicted and it was the first time she ever really seemed to get what it was all about. I watched her Nativity production and Christmas concert with pride after listening to her practise at home and on the walk to and from school for the last few weeks. She really got into the spirit, more so than she had before and actually for the first time enjoyed giving presents. She’d attended a Christmas Bazaar and had chosen, semi-wrapped and purchased an item for me and Adam. It was very sweet. She got me a bottle of perfume and Adam a packet of sweets which she insisted he share with her.Mini Kat Taking Elvis For Walk

In those few weeks between Christmas and February half term Mini Kat really became herself and had a lightbulb moment with her reading. She no longer really needs my help and is so independent. There are times when it really catches me out that my little gremlin can read a whole book, start to finish with no help. She practices her weekly words too with comfort and ease but her favourite lesson is apparently PE. I have a girly girl, she loves to dress up, hates wearing trousers and enjoys getting her hand on my make-up collection. But she also really, really loves running around and climbing, jumping and generally being a five year old child really. So she likes PE (She didn’t get that from me though…). She was also really, really excited about going to Disneyland and it was the most frequent topic of conversation in our house during that part of term. February half term was so busy with Disneyland, then seeing her dad and then coming back to two Birthday parties of two of her closest friends at school.

Then she went back to school, and her behaviour reverted to how it was in the summer. The last six weeks or so have been quite challenging again. I think a big part of it is that light bulb moment she had and now when we’re out and about her mind is processing things differently as she’s noticing letters and words and reading them. Her mood swings could rival a teenager. One moment she’s lovely and sweet and the next moment the attitude she has shocks me. She’s become quite aggressive, mainly I think through being overwhelmed and frustrated when she tries so hard to ‘get’ things but she’s still learning them. She’s often got right in my face and screamed at me with teeth gritted and I worry about where she has picked up this behaviour. Whilst she’s always been a bit of a growler in her mood swings the aggression is new to us and it worries me. The way she clenches her hands and grits her teeth and you can see the anger in her eyes.Grumpy Five Year Old in The Morning

Have I done something wrong?
How can I help ease this aggression?
Is it a phase?
Is it normal?

Looking StylishI ask myself these questions over and over again, constantly blaming myself thanks to #mumguilt. But then she does what she’s just done right now, run into the living room to sit by me and give me a cuddle, saying you’re the best and a little kiss. So I am hoping it’s just a phase, just because of so many new things in her life and that my kind, compassionate and sweet natured daughter is always there but sometimes her emotions get the best of her.


Do you have a five-going-on-fifteen year old at home? How do you cope with the mood swings?

Linked up with #bloggerclubUK & #bestandworst


  1. My oldest boy is almost 4, so a bit younger than your little girl, but he is really prone to outbursts of anger too, and I agree, it’s quite scary at times. I get the mum guilt too! Especially worrying that it’s due to me and his dad splitting up six months ago. I’m sure you’re doing a great job and it sounds as though she is a lovely little person most of the time 😉

    1. Author

      Thank you for commenting, as hard as it is it’s good to know that it is a phase! My daughters father and I are also no longer together although we haven’t been for a good few years now, sometimes I think that could have affected her but…I don’t know, it’s so hard.

  2. Crikey, reading this it was as though I wrote it myself! Our (only just) four year old is exactly the same…how can such a sweet and loving child turn into such a monster?! Ride it out, the storm will pass (heres hoping).

    x MMT #bestandworst

    1. Author

      In a way I’m so glad to know I’m not the only one. Deep breaths! Thanks for coming over 🙂 x

  3. I have a threenager heading into the fearsome foursomes……gah! What does the fifth year hold, wahh! My sons moods change like the wind, I find it hard to keep up. Great post and thanks for sharing with the #bestandworst

    1. Author

      I know it sort of feels like you’re just brushing it off doesn’t it but here’s hoping!

  4. Ahh its such a difficult time for parents and children isn’t it?! They are learning about the world and things around them. I have a nearly 3yr old and she was very much the same as in we never had a problem taking her to preschool, she loves it and I’m just hoping shes the same when she starts school next year. She will be one of the youngest in her class and only just 4 when she starts so I’m hoping its not too overwhelming for her! 🙂


    1. Author

      Oh bless her! I’m sure she will be fine if she is loving preschool and the new environment will be so interesting and exciting!

  5. I’ve still got it all to come – though my 15 month old already has an awful temper. If she can’t do something she gets frustrated and takes it out on whatever or whoever is closest. (Usually the poor dog…) I think as they get more confident in their learning and abilities, the frustration and anger will ease. Until it’s time for hormones to bring it back, of course!

    Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday x

  6. First, I would be remiss if I didn’t compliment you and your wee one on the Rainbow Dash backpack! I had to show it to my 5 1/2 year old because she is a pony fanatic! I too deal with mood swings that are more volatile than my teen son’s! For my daughter her line is “I quit” followed by her stomping away when she doesn’t get her way. I always chalked the difference between her and her brother at this age to girl rage. lol. When you find the solution let me know! In the meantime you are not alone! #kcacols

    1. Author

      Girl rage! That’s an excellent phrase that I may just have to pinch!

  7. I don’t as I have a son who is 22mo next week but I have a best friend who has a four year old who is testing the waters regarding her attitude etc. I’ve forwarded the link for this to her hoping it gives her some comfort! #KCACOLS

    1. Author

      I hope so! At least that she’s not alone anyway there seems to be a bunch of us! It’s reassuring to me anyway 🙂

  8. Kids definitely go through phases, hopefully the aggression is one of those 🙂 It’s great she is so independent now & doing so well at school! Thanks so much for joining us for #bloggerclubuk, hope you will be back again tomorrow! x

    1. Author

      I do hopes so. Yeah she is great most of the time I think it’s just using more brain power these days! 🙂

  9. Sounds like she’s been doing brilliantly at school. I don’t really know with the outbursts, but the processing of big skills seems to make sense. They’re like that when they’re small aren’t they – developing a new skill often leads to regressions or problem with behaviour for a while. Hope it settles down.
    Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday.

  10. Oh man, my 1-year-old already has the attitude of a teenager! Sometimes, he can be such a sasspot! It really sounds like she’s transitioning so well into school, and I’m so happy to hear that there were no tears! <3
    I follow an app called Wonder Weeks, and it tracks developmental leaps of infants and toddlers. I often find when my son is on the breakthrough of something big (crawling, pulling up, eating food, etc) the weeks before and after are very tough. Hopefully things will settle as she gets more comfortable in her reading! #KCACOLS

  11. All of these things are usually just a phase but if it carries on and you’re concerned then make an appointment to speak with her teacher to see if they’ve noticed anything or if there’s anything going on #KCACOLS

    1. Author

      That’s the thing! From other parents, she’s fine, her parents evening was glowing, she’s always a polite and conscientious girl at school. We did discuss it with her teacher but as they don’t experience the behaviour at school at all they couldn’t really offer much in terms of advice really. Which is what makes me think/hope it’s a phase and just part of being with mum!

  12. My eldest is exactly the same age. She’s not doing as well with the reading I must say, but ever since starting school she’s had a little more attitude too. I think it’s because they’re still establishing who they are in amongst all these new children. Finding their feet and their place almost. Though, she isn’t aggressive in the slightest. But I’m sure this is just a phase with your one for the reasons you mentioned above. I have everything crossed for you that it blows over soon. Thanks so much for linking up with #SundayStars Steph xxx

  13. I can’t relate quite yet as my littlest is only 2 but he’s been challenging enough so far (even though it’s just normal toddler behaviour). It seems as if they do go through stages, I suppose we all did the same growing up, we have so much to learn as parents! Thanks for linking up to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo

    1. Author

      Yeah I know what you mean, its a learning process for everyone! 🙂

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