Candyfloss & Dreams

Category: Lifestyle

lifestyle blog posts focusing on home, lifestyle, parenting, pregnancy, family life and home and style. Home decor and working at home, working at home as a self employed freelancer and blogger. Family lifestyle blog posts including family reviews, family products and saving money as a family. Being a more eco friendly family.

My Maternity & Newborn Baby Wishlist
Mum and Newborn Essentials

Some affiliate links may be used throughout this post.

Now I’m getting a little further along in my pregnancy I’ve started thinking about all those things I want and need for myself and the new baby once we’re home. Of course I started making this list before I properly announced my pregnancy on my blog which has just grown bigger and bigger. I am really trying to reign it all in a bit though because we are bringing the baby into a flat. We are already incredibly short of space as it is and in fact we are going to need to move and get rid of stuff before we can bring in the bigger purchases. I mean, as it currently stands, this little one doesn’t even have a chest of drawers or wardrobe for clothes. I am going to have to make use of what we already have to make sure we still have lots of space in the home without feeling too crowded. Hopefully, next year, we will be able to afford to move house!

I did quite a lengthy update of my first trimester and how things were going. At that point we hadn’t bought anything for this little one because I really want to find out the gender. However, that doesn’t stop me putting a list together and coming up with a bit of a wish list.

Breastfeeding Essentials

I fully intend to breastfeed for at least six months with this new baby. The truth is though, my breastfeeding journey with Evie was awful. I was belittled by a nursery nurse acting in place of my health visitor because Evie wasn’t gaining weight. I was forced to combination feed with formula at a really emotional state and before breastfeeding was even established. In hindsight, thinking about this continues to make me quite angry because I don’t feel I was given enough of a chance to try. Yes it was hard and I was feeding around the clock but this has made me really want to try and avoid formula milk. I have no problems with those that bottle feed at all because I know I am going to struggle and quite probably avoid breastfeeding in anywhere but my own home. Because of this we have made the choice to use breast milk exclusively with a combination of breastfeeding and expressing. I’m really happy with this choice and I am confident this will be the absolute best choice for our family.

My breastfeeding essentials are going to include the following:
1. An electronic double breast pump – I’m currently looking at the Medela Swing pump
2. Breast pads
3. Bottles, bottle brush and steriliser
4. Freezer bags for breast milk
5. Support pillow
6. Lansinoh cream – this is amazing for cracked nipples and I will absolutely have a tube at home for those first couple of weeks. It’s pretty amazing on cracked heels too!
Available to Buy Online: http://amzn.to/2GFptcT

Newborn Bedside Crib

Available to buy online: http://tidd.ly/e0ca754b

For this baby I really want to get a bedside crib because they look really lovely. I’ve never had a problem co-sleeping and did with Evie, particularly when we lived in the hostel together. It’s not something I’m ruling out with this baby either but Adam does have some reservations as he is a roller in the night. A bedside crib sounds like it will be our best option. Our hope is that it will last between birth and we are able to move next Spring (hopefully) because we just don’t have the space in our bedroom for a full sized cot. There isn’t space in Evie’s room either and I really want to avoid them sharing a room with such a big age gap. There are loads of amazing bedside cribs available and I am absolutely stuck for choice! My two favourites are the CHicco Next 2 Me Side Crib and the SnuzPod 3 in 1 Bedside crib.

Available to buy online: http://amzn.to/2pn3QH8

Newborn Baby Sleeping Bag

Available to Buy Online: http://tidd.ly/58d732e7

I love Grobags or baby sleeping bags. They are perfect to keep baby snug and warm at night. Our baby is due 20th September so it won’t be long until those nights are feeling colder and darker once again. There are lots of these available and they were so great for Evie, who was also a September baby, and loved being kept snug in her sleeping bag at night.

Available to Buy Online: http://tidd.ly/e8b7f6d5

Newborn Baby Pushchairs

Now this is probably going to be one of our biggest purchases because they just don’t come cheap do they? I have my eye on a couple that are absolutely lovely but really I want to go out and test drive a few before I decide on which one is for us. Adam is 6’5″ and I’m 5’4″ so ideally we are looking for one with a height adjustable handle to make it easy for both of us. Despite not being a driver we are considering a travel system just because we’re still going to need a car seat for getting home from the hospital as well as any journeys we do make with friends or family. I like the idea of having a travel system that goes from newborn bassinet to stroller too and hopefully it will last us a couple of years.

Available to Buy: http://amzn.to/2G2GxvB

Our favourite is the Giggle2 Cosatto Pram which comes in loads of different colours and I see them in use all the time. We’ve already had a bit of a play around with this one in Mothercare, however, I know there are a few others out there that I want to try too. Mostly, the pushchair will be upright and ready to use at a moments notice because of the amount we walk but we would like one that folds quite small. So far, in theory and appearance the Giggle2 ticks all of our boxes and is at a comfortable height for both of us to push. Later down the line though, we might find an even better one.

Baby Bath & Changing Unit

Now I know a lot of people would say that actually these aren’t an essential. You don’t need a baby bath if you can bath in the sink or in your own bath. You could simply use a bath seat instead to keep handsfree too. However, for us, a bath and changing unit is a bit of an essential because it doubles up as storage space. I will be keeping this in my bathroom which is actually bit enough to hold it without it getting in the way. We then have a place for storing nappies, bath toys, wipes, creams and all the other bits that you always need. It’s as much extra storage for us as anything else. Being in a flat means that nothing is far away so I don’t have to rush upstairs to change the baby when I can just go into the next room. We had a changing table with Evie and it really came in handy. It was still in use as she got older for storage too.

Available to Buy Online: http://amzn.to/2ICI3Dk

I love the look of the Easi Peasi Fable Changer by Cosatto. There’s even a magical unicorns design which Evie is very much drawn to.

Stretchy Wrap for Newborns

I didn’t have a wrap with Evie so babywearing is completely new to me. Hopefully my plans for a VBAC go ahead as wanted and I can start wrapping up soon after. I love the idea of having the baby close to me, comforted and most importantly being hands free. As I’ve mentioned before we walk a lot and sometimes a wrap or carrier is going to be easier and quicker than a pushchair or big bulky pram. The idea of having the baby close and secure whilst I help Evie with her homework or get on with a few things around the house really appeals to me as well as when getting out and about too. I don’t know if it will help with breastfeeding just because there aren’t many positions I can really feed in due to my size but wraps seem to be used for so much more. I want to watch a few videos and have a practise tying it all together before the baby is here to try and get some practise in.

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Baby Play Mat

I had a couple of these soft activity mats with Evie when she was little and think they’re great for tummy time. I especially love ones that have lots of textures for babies to feel and play with as they start getting a bit bigger and it will add a nice bit of colour into the living room too. We won’t be getting much when it comes to toys because of space but I think a play mat like this is a great buy.

Available to buy online: http://tidd.ly/6ef1a3c2

So that is our little list of newborn baby essentials to help me with breastfeeding, getting out the home and giving the baby a little quality tummy time too. What essentials would you recommend for a new baby?

For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
May 6, 2018
Tips for Booking a Cruise that is Suitable for Children

This is a collaborative post.

If you are looking for a family holiday and have never considered going cruising before, please read on. We were lucky enough to go on a cruise to Norway in 2016 and earlier in 2015 we went to Bruges. To say we enjoyed ourselves is an understatement. The whole family had a great time, so I would say that cruising with children is a good idea. However, there are a few things you need to be aware of and consider before you book.

Be sure to do your own research

It is important to do your own research before booking. There is no harm in asking a travel agent for suggestions or looking at sites like mine to get some ideas about where to go and who to travel with.

However, before you actually book, take some time to find out as much as you can about that particular cruise. Every ship is different. So, if your kids love climbing walls you want to be sure the boat you book has one. Doing your own research ensures you pick up on the little things that you know are important for you and your children. No matter how good your travel agent is they do not know your kids like you do.

How welcome will your kids be?

When looking for a cruise it is important to book yourself onto a ship that specifically caters for children. This is the best way to ensure that you and your family will be welcome on board rather than just tolerated. You want your children to be able to relax and not to have to keep them quiet all day long when you are at sea.

It is always nice for your children to have someone their own age to play with. Choosing to travel on a ship that specifically caters for children is the best way to make sure that there will be other families onboard.

Book early

If you can, book early. Family-friendly cruises tend to sell out fast, so leaving it too late could lead to disappointment. Booking early has the added benefit of keeping the price down. Most cruise firms offer the best discounts when they first release the cabins for sale.

Get your children involved

Once you have narrowed down the options, see what the kids think. Getting them involved in the final choice is a great way of making sure they have a good time.

Try a mini-cruise first

Booking a short cruise is the ideal way to work out whether this type of holiday is really right for you and your children. It is a relatively inexpensive way for you to put your toe in the water (pun not intended).

Tips for enjoying your cruise

The above covers booking your cruise. If you want to find out more about how to get the most out of your shipboard holiday, click this link. When you do you will be taken to an article that contains 9 further tips that will ensure that you and your children can relax and have a good time once you are onboard.

May 4, 2018
To Bottle or Breastfeed?

Breastfeeding or bottle feeding: It’s an ongoing debate it seems between parents, who is better for whichever choice they make. Both advocates feel pressured, judged and are still faced with feeding their newborn through the sleepless nights. Personally, I don’t really care how another person wants to feed their baby. I know the facts about breast milk and I know that formula is there as a substitute. I know my decision isn’t really anyone else’s business and likewise, it doesn’t affect me how you choose to feed your baby. Do whatever is best for your family, your situation and your circumstance.

I wanted to breastfeed but struggled.

For me, I wanted to breastfeed with Evie so badly. I remember speaking to a midwife in hospital one day about it whilst I was being monitored for, I think, the baby having a raised heartbeat and my high blood pressure (after having a cervical sweep, I might add) and she responded with ‘It doesn’t matter to me how you feed your baby, you just do what works for you.’ Part of me thought shouldn’t she be championing breastfeeding as the best way, whilst another of me felt quietly relieved. I was so worried and worked up about breastfeeding not working for me that I remember being reassured that I could always have a few bottles of those ready made formula to hand just in case I was finding it tough. Looking back now, despite saying I wanted to breastfeed that wasn’t really the right advice for me.

As it turned out I fed for two weeks exclusively, crying through growth spurts and struggling with my c-section wound, a new baby and my family being so far away. It was a really emotional time, I felt completely alone and, whilst my health visitor was actually really nice and reassuring, there were some healthcare professionals that weren’t as helpful. The trouble with my breastfeeding journey is that Evie wasn’t really putting on weight. She has having lots of wet and dirty nappies. She was hitting regular milestones and she was feeding very regularly. From two weeks on we added a couple of bottles of formula in to boost her weight gain but she was still mostly breastfeed and this continued until she was about 10 weeks old. It was then I saw a different health care provider, a nursery nurse in place of the health visitor who made me feel like I was the worst mother in the world. She made me feel inadequate and useless. She made me feel like I was consciously trying to starve my baby. She told me my breast milk wasn’t good enough and that I needed to switch to formula. Over the next few weeks I was decreasing my feeds and increasing formula feeds so that by Christmas Evie had moved on exclusively to formula milk.

So now I’m faced with making that choice again with this baby however I have a lot more in my corner to help me with my decisions. Firstly, I know that I can breastfeed. I know that my body does work the way it’s supposed to because I’ve done it before. With that knowledge I know I can try breastfeeding again with so much more faith in myself. Secondly, I am a little older and a little wiser and I hope this time around I’ll be so much more confident in my decision. I have a supportive partner and I’m closer to more family who I know will back up my decision as well as being there on the tougher days. I know if I get told something like that again, feel like I’m failing, I have so many more people to reassure me. I am also confident in my decision to not exclusively breastfeed and I fully intend to express breast milk too. I feel that by expressing breast milk I will give Adam the chance for a few feeds, it will give me a little bit of rest and it will be the best milk choice for my baby. I would love to breastfeed up through to the first year, but six months is my goal.

Despite all this knowledge and wants for the baby I still have some fears when it comes to breastfeeding. I am not confident to be able to feed in public. It really doesn’t matter whether places ‘allow’ me to do it. I honestly feel the only place I will feel comfortable feeding is in my own home. This of course puts a lot of restrictions in place doesn’t it as it’s going to stop me going out and about for long periods of time. Having massive boobs kind of means any form of discreet feeding is out the window, especially as before I was only ever able to feed in a rugby ball hold position with around eight pillows stacked up around me. I’m not exactly going to be carrying a surplus of pillows around with me, especially in those early weeks, so this again leads me to believing that expressing milk is going to be a really good move for us as a family.

How will breastfeeding work for us as a family?

Through doing some research I am going to try an electronic breast pump. I had a manual one with Evie and it was rubbish. I really struggled to express with it so I’m hoping that an electronic one will do a much better job. I can’t imagine it’s going to be a comfortable or happy experience for anyone but if it means I can still continue to give my baby breast milk for as long as possible then I am all for trying. The Lansinoh single electronic breast pump is going to be getting quite a bit of action in our home when this baby is here. I’ve never used an electronic one before and it does all sound a little technical. I imagine it will take some practise. I know that you shouldn’t really express until breastfeeding is established and your milk has come through properly but I want to make sure my supply is enough to have those extra feeds ready to the point we have a bit of a surplus in the freezer. The Lansinoh single electronic breast pump is BPA and BPS free with a silicone breast cushion. It features 2-phase technology with a ‘let-down’ and ‘expression’ mode allowing for your comfort. There are six adjustable suction settings to make sure you’re getting the right suction from the pump too. The pump can be plugged into the mains or it can take 6 AA batteries when you’re out of the home. The bottle comes with a suitable sealing disc and teat so that you can pump, store and feed at your convenience.

Available to buy on Amazon: https://amzn.to/2Eu5f3b (Affiliate Link)

However you choose to feed your baby just know that there are plenty of options for you and your family. I’m so happy that expressing is an option that’s available to us and one I fully intend to use to my benefit. This way I know anyone can safely feed my baby at any time with milk that is specifically designed for them. Now we just have to hope this little one will take to a bottle!

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What did you decide with your children? Can you offer any advice or tips?

Disclaimer: I was sent the Lansinoh single electronic breast pump for the purpose of this feature and to talk openly about my desire to express breast milk. This may not be your decision but I hope you can appreciate that it is mine and one I’m happy with.

April 19, 2018
My Choice to Hire a Doula

Hiring a Doula for my Second Pregnancy

Have you ever hired a Doula before? I hadn’t, in fact, during my first pregnancy I didn’t even know that support like this existed. Perhaps if I had, my birth with my first daughter would have been so much easier. This time around, I am seeking out the best possible support I can to ensure I have the pregnancy, labour and birth that I want to have. After having a traumatic birth with an emergency c-section which in all honestly feels like such a long time ago now, I feel a little more informed about how I want this pregnancy to go. I’ve decided to have a hospital birth, I’m going to be pushing for a VBAC and now, thanks to the Doula I have decided to hire, I feel so much more informed about my choices. Now my first trimester is over and I’m welcoming the second, I feel like it’s the right time to start making some choices about my birth plan and support.

What is a Doula

A Doula is someone that offers support throughout pregnancy and birth. Some Doulas also offer postnatal care. You can have a Doula for pregnancy and Birth only, postnatal only or both. It depends on your preferences. Hiring a Doula is the same as paying for a private service. Most Doulas are hired by clients and packages are offered at a price that reflects the support offered by the Doula personally. You can choose to hire a longstanding Doula with experience or a newly qualified Doula who may be a little cheaper. Doulas do not offer a clinical or medical service but often have holistic therapy training to enable them to provide a variety of support. No doubt, there is probably a Doula out there for every woman depending on her needs and preferences. For vulnerable women there are a few NHS Doulas and the Doula Access Fund, a charity that works with women in need of extra support and care as well as women’s refuges. I’ve spoken openly about my own time in a women’s refuge and I’m really glad that this charity exists.

Searching for a Doula

I literally searched ‘Doula in Hampshire’ because that’s where I live and was pushed to click through the Hampshire Doula website. There were a few ladies on there which advertised their websites and contact details. I was drawn to one in particular and clicked through to find out more about her services. I really liked the sort of package she was offering for a ‘Birth Only’ Doula and decided to send her a message. Her name is Sophie, she’s relatively close to me and she suggested that I interview her. We arranged a time and date that suited us both and as she was close to my hometown it was for later on that week. Sophie recommended that both myself and Adam were there to chat to her so we could both ask questions and get everything out in the open. If you’re based in Hampshire and would like to read about Sophie’s experience and packages you can visit her website.

Interviewing a Doula

Sophie said that the most important thing when hiring a Doula is that you connect with each other and I completely get that. Preparing for labour and birth is incredibly personal and you ultimately want someone with you who you feel is going to be supportive and encouraging. If you don’t like your Doula then it’s going to affect your birth and you won’t feel comfortable getting into the nitty gritty with them. Sophie has been a Doula for a few years and the testimonials on her website were really positive and encouraging. I was looking forward to meeting her and feel we connected right away. Rather than a full on interview it was a very casual chat about everything really. Sophie is so informed about women’s choices during pregnancy and birth, some of which I did not know I was entitled to refuse. Sometimes choices are pushed on you which make you feel a little anxious but I really feel that with Sophie’s help I will be armed with a lot of information and with the help of my medical support I will be able to make the choices that let me have the best possible labour and birth whether that is the very hoped for VBAC or the possible Elective C-Section.

What I loved about Sophie is her friendly, bubbly and upfront personality. She is completely on board with Hypnobirthing and Childbirth Aromatherapy which are two things I really want to use in this pregnancy. Whilst she recommended that we interviewed other Doula’s in the area and sleeping on it, Adam and I felt she was already the right choice for us. Sophie had an agreement for us to read through and sign and alongside this and paying the deposit she is booking us in for September.

What’s Next?

Sophie is going to help us with our birth plan with some lengthy antenatal style visits, support me with hypnobirthing and go through the essential oils we can use. For a four week period around my due date Sophie will be available to me to assist with labour and birth including coming with me to the hospital. I feel that with Adam and Sophie, alongside my midwife and the staff at my chosen hospital I am going to be able to have a positive birth experience and I feel really good about the rest of this pregnancy. I will be writing more about using a Doula in my pregnancy updates and hopefully we will be able to tell you more when I write up our birth story.

For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.

April 12, 2018
Books You Need to Read when Pregnant
Contains Affiliate Links.

Things have changed since I was last pregnant. There are new practices, screening tests, appointments, things to talk about and all sorts. Having a seven-year gap between pregnancies has been a real eye opener for just how much the medical world has changed. A few other wonderful things that have happened in the last few years is I have changed. I have grown as a person because I’m a mother. I have started to see things differently. I have had more confidence in my opinions, my actions and more reason to justify why I do the things I do. One thing I didn’t even know I had was certain rights about what happens when I’m pregnant.

You see I’m another high risk pregnant woman with a BMI of 45 at booking and having had a previous c-section. My blood pressure is fine, my iron levels are amazing, my platelets and white blood cells are where they need to be and I have no other serious illnesses. I’m simply fat and have an old surgical wound. This has lead to me making a few decisions I didn’t really need to or know about with my first pregnancy. The first being that I really want to try for a VBAC – that is, vaginal birth after caesarean. My midwife is supportive of this which is brilliant. I haven’t met with a consultant yet, I will, but now I know that actually I don’t have to take their advice has given me a new found confidence. Now, before anyone jumps the gun, no I’m not purposely ignoring any advice at the risk of myself or my baby but I am going to alter that advice to suit my needs, my labour and my birth.

You see, when you’re pregnant, part of your body doesn’t really feel like yours. You sort of scare medical professionals a bit and so some doctors can use a lot of terminology to make you feel like you don’t have a choice. Well, you absolutely have a choice. You always have a choice. Always. I’m not going to tell anyone how they should or should not give birth. What I’m saying is every decision you make should be an informed one and sometimes, just hearing what a doctor has to say does not make you informed. You see, midwives and doctors have to say a lot of things to make you aware of potential risks. That’s a good thing, you need to know about these risks but ultimately, you can decide what you feel is best for your body, your pregnancy, your baby and the welfare of your family. I’ve been doing a little extra reading this time around and I really do feel fully informed about all the choices I plan to make, any screenings I plan to reject and I know, with the help of my very lovely Doula, I am going to have a concise birth plan that will suit my needs and cater to every possible birthing outcome or obstacle.

Here is my list of extra reading that I absolutely recommend you take a look at when pregnant:
1. 1. AIMS: For a better birth website – full of amazing, useful information. This organisation covers everything you could possibly want to know about birth. Questions are answered and they campaign tirelessly for better maternity services in the UK. This is the best place to start if you have to make some decisions, if you have questions or doubts. The birth information covers frequently asked questions, home birth and maternity rights and benefits.
  2. Am I Allowed? By AIMS – A brilliant, informative read helping you to make all the decisions you feel you need to make for your pregnancy, labour and birth from screening tests, scans, blood tests and birth choices.
  3. Birth After Caesarean – By Jenny Lesley – Something very relevant to me. Again, this is free if you have Kindle unlimited and is also available to buy as a hard copy.
  4. Mindful Hypnobirthing by Sophie Fletcher – You might or might not have an interest in hypnobirthing but studies have shown some really positive things about how hypnobirthing and mindfullness techniques really help during pregnancy, labour and birth. This book is full of useful exercises that you can start from early pregnancy and continue all the way through with the hope of giving you a relaxed, calm and peaceful birth experience.
  5. Positive Birth Book by Milli Hill – another great read full of information and again focusing on birth as a positive experience.
  6. Men, Love & Birth by Mark Harris – one for dads but I’ve had a little sneak read myself too. This is written by a dad and male midwife and is really insightful into the dad’s role. Mark is also trained in NLP which does come into play in this book. I got this for Adam to have a read through and it seems to be all about how to support a partner through pregnancy, labour, birth and those early days.
I hope you find this reading educational, informative and overall helps you to make any decisions to enable you to have a happy, positive birth.

For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
April 5, 2018