Tag: fat

  • Shaming Fat People and Parents will NEVER end Obesity.

    Shaming Fat People and Parents will NEVER end Obesity.

    The latest in how we all hate fat people (I am a fat person) is a medievil magnetic structure to prevent your mouth opening more than like 2mm – here’s the Guardian article and back to school weigh ins in September. It’s all a load of absolute bullshit. 2mm? Is that some sort of liquid diet from now on then? The issue isn’t a complete lack of control about shoving food in all day long it’s all complex and has so many varients that will cost money to fix but we have a hoarding, greedy government that only want short term solutions. They don’t care about your issues or problems or disorders or poverty that cause many people problems when it comes to food so instead they are, yet again, going to shame fat people, parents of children being weighed and compared to a BMI scale thats outdated.

    My Issue With School Weigh Ins

    My daughter is going through her hormone things. I mean it’s a battle to get her to eat fruit and vegetables but she does. She has a relatively healthy diet despite changing her mind what she will eat on a bi-weekly basis. She has a healthy portion, she has a school dinner and she’s tried a variety of foods. She has some issues but I try really hard to make all kinds of food accessible to her. Now she’s getting closer and closer to her teens she’s had another massive growth spurt, she’s filling out in a perfectly healthy way and that means she has some fat to her body. Finding clothes to fit her has started to become a problem and she mostly has to buy things aged 12-14 depending on where we shop. Things don’t fit her well in the length and of course in every shop sizing is different. We tried her in ‘adult’ sizes and she was a size six to eight. Perfectly healthy for a growing preteen body that is filling out and getting taller.

    If I am told in September that she is ‘at risk’ of being overweight or obese I will scream. I am genuinely worried about what it will do to her self confidence. I really try to be size inclusive, talk positively and I don’t comment on her body. I try not to restrict food in an unhealthy way and as a result my daughter doesn’t binge the way I do. I could absolutely do better but I could also do worse. I want to promote a healthy, varied relationship with food and joyous movement. I want to promote a positive body attitude and reiterate that fat is a normal, healthy part of your body growing and changing. I don’t want my daughter to get caught out thinking a size 12, 14 or 16 is unhealthy like I did and as a result have binge eating, disordered eating and a terrible relationship with my body and food.

    I worry that school weigh ins will shame parents that are from poorer backgrounds especially like I was because there is a huge link between poverty and obesity but why would the Tories want to fix that? They hate the poor!

    Things that SHOULD happen instead of shaming parents, school weigh ins and mouth torture devices

    • Allow children to see all different body shapes and sizes moving, happy, living their best lives and existing.
    • Allow children to see all different body shapes and sizes exercising. That kind of has to start with me really, the fat woman doing yoga and lifting weights and swimming like I used to.
    • Teach children proper nutrition and how to cook from scratch not just cake baking. Change the curriculum to include making sauces, trying lots of different fruit and vegetables, meal planning for a family and finding new favourite flavours.
    • Stop labelling food as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ choices because that develops into guilt and shame. Food is food.
    • Talk about eating disorders and the problems they cause and where they can come from. It’s not just binge and purge.
    • Talk about emotional eating and finding nourishment. When we figure out the craving or emotion we can turn to something else rather than food.
    • Stop talking about taking things out of meals but instead what we can put in? What will give us more nourishment, more nutrition, more colour to our plates?
    • Stop promoting slimming clubs outside schools. Children don’t need to diet and they don’t need to see those kind of advertisements reminding them that they’re not good enough, not skinny enough, not slim enough and not someone they’ve never mets ideal beauty standard. Actively be anti-diet
    • Offer therapy for eating disorder patients including the fat ones. Believe fat people when they say they have a problem with food or an eating disorder.
    • Offer children a variety of sports at school so they can find something they enjoy. Give them choice. Stop making them play endless games (I’m looking at you, Rounders) that they hate playing.
    • Teach children that another person’s body has nothing to do with them, to be kind as bodies around them change and grow.
    • Make healthy food choices more appealing and accessible. Stop shops discounting processed food which is affordable and instead focus on things like fruit and vegetable boxes.

    Ultimately it’s a lot of work from parents and what teachers have to teach. It’s changing the attitude. It’s stopping using an out dated system to measure health. It’s getting to the root cause of the issue – why does this problem have an issue with food? How can we help them overcome this issue? This is a mental health problem just as much, if not more, than it is a physical one. If loosing weight was just as simple as not opening your mouth then we would all be thin all the time. It’s also important to remember thiness does not autimatically equal health, just as fatness does not automatically equal lack of self control.

  • I’m Too Fat To Be Body Positive

    I’m Too Fat To Be Body Positive

    On one hand I see slimmer women from magazines, airbrushed and photoshopped giving me an unrealistic view of beauty and health and on the other I see women the same size as me confident and content with their bodies. I can’t help but feel what is wrong with me. I am not body confident, the way I look disgusts me.

    It’s totally my fault of course because I own my body and I have made the decisions that make it the way it is right now. I ate the food, I moved less, I had children and in those years I’ve created a mindset that has a unhealthy view of food. I restrict then binge, yo-yo diet and workout but then I get complacent, or bored, or lose willpower or feel pressured and I stop. My attitude towards food is unhealthy and my attitude towards exercise is it’s painful and I feel humiliated doing it.

    But I see so many women, some the same size, some larger than me loving themselves and I don’t understand what there is to love. I don’t love anything about my body, I don’t love anything about the way I look. I don’t have respect or pride for my scars and stretchmarks. All I see is fatty flesh, shoulders too big for my small head, horrible hair that never looks right however it’s cut, makeup that I can’t ever “do” proplerly so it always looks cakey no matter my budget. I see tiny hands with bitten nails, hard skin, soft pudgy bits that don’t sit right in any clothes. I feel chub rub, boob sweat and all the aches and pains that come with carrying excess fat around my body. Do these body positive, body confident women not feel these things either? Is there something wrong with me that only I suffer with these problems of being so overweight?

    Do they not find it hard getting in and out of the bath? Do they not have to put the shampoo and conditioner in reach before getting in because the tyres around their middle prevent them actually reaching forward enough? Do they not sweat so much it makes them embaressed to go outside? Do they not look at themselves and the sag and excess skin and sretch marks and wish at times they could just unzip it at the back and step out of this fat suit? If they don’t feel like this then why do I feel like this if I am “one of them”

    I do not want to be so slim and so ripped. I don’t need loads of muscles on show or eight abs. I don’t care about having a bit of a mum pouch from my two c-sections. I just want to wear a pair of jeans from a supermarket rather than expensive shops dedicated to plus sizes. I want to buy a bra that costs £6 instead of £36. I want to have a healthy respect for my body and a positive relationship with food.

    I do not want to spend the next thirty years of my life stepping on and off the sad step until I reach my target weight and then obsessing over maintaining that weight for years to come. I do not want to have to restrict myself from food groups forever. I just want to be able to understand when I’m full and to have enough. I don’t want to have to overeat to the point of discomfort and I want to continue actually really enjoying food because it tastes so good. I don’t want to be stuck on a traffic light system focusing in on labels for the rest of my life in case something is too fatty or too high in sugar.

    I want to learn to trust myself to make healthy choices and to enjoy movement. I want to be a good role model to my kids and show them that being healthy is not about being thin but it is about mental relationships. I do not want my children to live a live of obsession over their weight but how can I prevent that when the way I look disgusts me and drives me own obsession with diet culture.

    I feel pressured, overwhelmed and disgusted at myself and I do not know where to start. I am too fat to be body positive and I am too fat to be healthy.

    Woman looking out the window, blog post on how I'm too fat to feel body positive text in white on orange background at the top of the image. #bodypositive #fat #plussize #lifestyle #womenshealth