Candyfloss & Dreams

Tag: high risk pregnancy

  • The Positive Birth Story of Felix

    The Positive Birth Story of Felix

    I wanted to write my birth story fairly early whilst I still remember most of the details.

    The plan: High BMI VBAC at Home
    The Result: Unplanned C-Section

    I’m glad to finally be able to share my birth story with you and the birth of my second child. What I have learned is that a positive experience does not always mean one that goes to plan, but that from the experience – that takes time to process, and will take more time in the case of the birth of my son, you feel positive. I can not fault the care I received during labour, delivery and post natal whilst at Basingstoke hospital. I have felt listened to, respected, cared for and most importantly completely supported and looked after thanks to the Hampshire Hospitals maternity team.

    My beautiful son was born at 8.46pm and delivered by a second unplanned cesarean section weighing 9lbs9oz at 40+13 weeks. He arrived into the world with shocks and surprised at his size on Thursday 4th October after a pretty lengthy labour. This was kicked off with a cervical sweep at 12noon on Wednesday 3rd October, with tightenings and a bit of a show from 3pm. I was booked in for 9.30am the next day to my hospital to have my waters broken if things had not progressed. I am so pleased, and proud of myself, that they did. I called my wonderful Doula around 10pm who helped me set up the environment in the living room with tea lights. I was using my birthing ball and keeping hydrated. I got a couple of hours sleep to try and conserve my energy a bit and made great use of up breathing and my Babycare TENS machine. By around 8.30am I was struggling a little and wanted some more pain relief so we went in to hospital for 9.30am as expected and I was taken straight to a delivery room.

    high bmi unplanned c-section birth story
    C-Section Recovery: Just after surgery losing 1.5 litres of blood, very dosed up with a very alert baby boy!

    I was introduced to my midwife and student midwife who would be looking after me and I accepted an examination to find I had got to three cm and full effacement so I requested to wait to break my waters and the midwives were happy with that. I also accepted a CTG trace for 30 minutes whilst bouncing on the ball as I was hoping for a VBAC and due to my size it was a bit of a challenge getting a good read on my baby’s heart rate. After the trace the midwives were happy to resume intermittent monitoring for the rest of my labour. After 4 hours I accepted another examination and I was found at 4cm. Things had not progressed as quickly as I would have liked and so I accepted having my waters broken to try and help things along a little bit. Once this was done things began to get a little intense for me.

    Parents in Theatre with Newborn, high bmi unplanned c-section birth story

    Up until this point my labour had been everything I wanted however eventually I was struggling to differentiate between the contractions and I wasn’t actually noticing any breaks or dips in the pain. I was saying I couldn’t cope anymore, I was sick a couple of times and I wanted to stop. Something in my mind was telling me that this was, sadly, not the transitional period we were hoping it was. At 7pm I accepted another examination to find there had been no progress. I was getting worried about the amount of pain I was in and how difficult it was for the midwives to get a heartbeat from my baby. It was at this point I requested we go to theatre for a c-section. This was never what I wanted but ultimately, I am incredibly happy with my decision, especially with what I know now. I met the obstetrician who talked me through the consent form and explained the surgery. I was feeling really very anxious at this point and as they had to take away the gas and air and my TENS machine I was struggling but tried using up breathing, relaxing my jaw and shoulders through each contraction as I was taken into theatre. Thankfully the surgery was done under a spinal block which was a little hard to administer but eventually we got there.

    high bmi unplanned c-section birth story

    Surgery took longer than expected as when the doctors got to my uterus they found more scar tissue and a hole in my womb. They found a very weak uterus that hadn’t been contracting as effectively as it should have been which could have been due to a number of things. My BMI was one, his size was another and unfortunately this just was not meant to be for me. Now I know this I feel even better that at the time I made the best decision for everyone and that has made this birth a really positive one for me. At no point did I feel out of control or disrespected. I love the fact that most of the people in theatre were women including the three amazing doctors who put me back together again. I loved seeing Adam holding our son by our head. I think we had optimal cord clamping which I requested and I would have liked to hold him however I was really feeling quite unwell during the surgery and I ended up falling asleep after asking the anaesthetist if it was safe to do so. I then got to carry my son through to recovery where we did get some of that lovely skin to skin and I got to see his beautiful face properly.

    Siblings meeting each other for the first time, Vhigh bmi unplanned c-section birth story
    The moment your children meet each other is one of the most amazing, magical moments I have ever experienced.

    Adam and my Doula Sophie were so amazing and the team that took care of me offered so many lovely congratulations. I ended up staying in hospital until Sunday 7th October and I’m now continuing to recover at home. Family and friends have been amazingly supportive and I cant wait to get back up on my feet again properly. I am so pleased and proud to introduce everyone to my little boy Felix David Locke. Despite what has happened I still passionately believe in birth planning and I think all of the preparation I did with Hypnobirthing, particularly The Digital Pack by the Positive Birth company, having my amazingly wonderful Doula to support me through pregnancy and a very loving, kind and compassionate partner made this the most positive birth I could have had. It just seems I am that woman and I am one of the statistics. But I am here, I am safe, and I am teary but so happy. I really believe sharing birth stories helps women come to terms with any fear they may feel and I honestly believe the amount of information I consumed during pregnancy was so beneficial. Sharing my birth story is, I hope, a way of giving back to those women and to also say that despite things going differently, I am feeling really well in myself.

    Second birth, unplanned c-section birth story

    For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.

  • Why You Should Write A Birth Plan for Every Pregnancy

    Writing a Birth Plan to some people might seem completely pointless and I totally get that. Birth is unpredictable. You might be given a due date but that baby could turn up anytime really from 38 weeks when you’re considered full term. Sometimes it even happens before that and sometimes you’re left their waiting until 42 weeks after hanging on to your due date for so long. You don’t know how, where or when labour will spontaneously happen either. If having a plan sounds a bit too much then think about it as your birth preferences. Think about a plan A, your ideal birth experience and then have some things in mind for a plan B and C just in case things do become a little more unexpected. People have said to me just “go with the flow” but I really can’t do that. I’m not that sort of person. I like knowing what type of pain relief is available and thinking ahead of the type I would prefer to have. I like working things out in stages and even if things change I know exactly what course I would like to follow after a particular change. Having a high BMI also makes me more at risk and makes monitoring harder and the type of monitoring I want to have isn’t something I want to think about whilst I’m trying to let my body do what it should know what to do!

    no guilt pregnancy plan, birth plan
    Buy Online at Amazon: https://amzn.to/2uGEO8y (Affiliate Link)

    My first pregnancy was really straightforward however with an induction and then failure to progress during pushing which then lead to an unplanned c-section so this time around I am hoping for an at home VBAC birth but I also have an idea of how I’d like to have a planned c-section. In all fairness, I really don’t want to have a c-section at all. The idea of having another round of surgery whilst being overweight and the longer recovery period is making me feel increasingly worried, however, on the flip side, being induced increases the chance of scar weakening and rupture. It’s really hard when you’re a high risk pregnancy but that’s why I think it’s even more important to have a birth plan or birth preferences in mind. I’ve put together a list of books that I think are must reads when pregnant which could really help with planning a positive birth.

    The benefits of a birth plan for me have been:

    • Helped with my anxiety. I feel I’ve ironed out every detail in my mind of how I’d like to birth and I feel really positive about labour.
    • A plan A, B and C has allowed me to think of best and worst case scenarios for the birth and where it will happen
    • I have made my preferences clear to my midwife, consultant, doula and consultant midwife – all of which are being helpful, positive and supportive
    • I understand a lot about the risks and benefits of the type of birth I want as well as what might happen if things don’t go to plan
    • I feel more connected to my body and baby
    • Midwives can easily see exactly what I want and expect from the birth as well as my newborn preferences
    • In the throws of labour I shouldn’t need to answer lots of questions about what I want as it’s clearly marked out and I am hoping easy for my midwife to be really in tune with
    • It has taken away a lot of the overwhelm and helped me come to terms better with my previous birth

    I wanted to share some top tips when it comes to writing a birth plan and how I’ve made some of the decisions I have for having a positive birth experience as well as explaining some of my choices for this birth and my baby.

    1. When writing a birth plan, put the most important information at the top so it’s clear. For me, I have put that I have anxiety, that I’ve been in an abusive relationship and that my consent for internal examinations is important. I feel this really sets my birth plan off in the right way and will hopefully eliminate the issues I had with my previous pregnancy and the lack of communication and empathy I had from my previous birth and hospital.
    2. Add names of your birth partners and the location in which you are planning to give birth. I have named myself, my partner and my doula as well as what we like to be called. This makes it nice and easy should I be transferred to hospital during labour and for any midwives handing over to know who we are and what to call us. I know it sounds obvious but it just makes it nice and straightforward.
    3. Try and keep it to one page. Think of it as an overview for the birth. Mine is two pages because I have one for a VBAC and another for a planned c-section should it get to that stage. I have laid it all out in sections from staying at home, first stage of labour, transition to hospital, second stage of labour, the placenta and my newborn preferences. These are headings you might want to consider.
    4. If you’re a planner, like me, you might want to consider writing everything down in list form and then condensing down. My birth plan was originally eight pages long and went into a lot of detail which I’ve managed to hammer out after writing letters to my consultant and talking through with my doula. I now feel like my notes and my birth plan represent exactly the type of experience I want.
    5. If you prefer visual birth planning I strongly recommend the Positive Birth Book which will direct you to free images to use to create a visual birth plan. Or you can get really creative and draw your own visual birth plan if that helps! It should be an experience that makes you feel good and prepared.
    6. Make time to talk through your birth plan with your health care team when you approach the third trimester.

    Writing a Birth Plan for every pregnancy #birth #birthstory #birthplan #positivebirth #positivebirthplan #writingabirthplan #pregnancy #thirdtrimester

    For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.