Candyfloss & Dreams

Author: Kat Candyfloss

How We FINALLY got a PS5

If you, like me, have been trying to get a PS5 FOR MONTHS then you will know it’s no easy feat. The newest console was released in November 2020 and preorders sold out incredibly quickly. Add in a global pandemic, people off work and furloughed, factories and ports running on skeleton staff as well as, here in the UK, all the issues Brexit has caused and you have a bit of a delay getting stock delivered. And then, you have people wanting to exploit this and make a huge profit. Now, I know people flip merchandise and tech products but I have never seen something quite so bad as this. There has been a whole system of people setting up bots to purchase all stock from retailers within the same minute of Playstation 5’s going online. This has included various retailers like Currys, Smyths, John Lewis, Game and Very – amongst a few others. It’s been really frustrating for genuine gamers who just like to play video games. This leaves us with two options – wait for stock to drop and attempt fastest finger first or buy one for double, sometimes triple the price on eBay.

Where Can I Buy a PS5 now in the UK?

The good news is most retailers are stocking them online more often but still quite sporadically. Stock is coming into the UK and more people are having better luck getting them from electronics and homeware retailiers such as Amazon, Very, Currys, Smyths, AO and ShopTo. BT customers have been able to get one from BT and John Lewis has stocked as well. Game regularly open up for preorders for their next big stock drop too. The bad news is they go out of stock very quickly thanks to people using bots to buy out all the stock virtually the same minute it comes in. I would not recommend buying one from eBay right now.

It’s been a problem honestly. Usually, we aren’t too fussed wanting a next gen console straight away but we both have anticipated games releasing, work is slow and we’re still supposed to stay home. Having something to do, for a lot of people, something to kind of take our minds off the crappy reality of a pandemic and brexit and just the mundane routine of staying home – well, a PS5 seemed like a pretty good option. Adam *almost* gave in and purchased through eBay but after looking into it in more detail and seeing that the seller would only discuss through Whatsapp rather than eBay’s messenger I was like no, that’s a scam. There are hundreds of these going on claiming to sell PS5’s but won’t communicate in the way eBay recommends so if you hand over the money and don’t get the goods you haven’t got a leg to stand on. We’ve had a friend get stung this way as well as I’ve seen parents who aren’t gamers themselves get caught out trying to get one for their children.

Then you have the parasites, otherwise known as ‘Scalpers’ that are using bots to buy out all of the stock as soon as it goes on sale to see the prices double, triple way over the RRP. These people are just wanting to turn a huge profit and honestly in this current climate it’s really awful. Frustratingly, online retailers seem to not care because it’s still a sale for them – although some have put in a 1 per customer policy. Adding a captcha would also help eliminate bots from purchasing as well as putting the products behind an account ie – no check out as a guest option. Of course, retailers are just ‘expressing their apologies’ rather than going above and beyond to allow genuine customers the chance to purchase. The thing is, the world will start up again and stock will be readily avalable and these sellers will be forced to bring their prices right down but until then it kind of feels like The Hunger Games when trying to make a purchase.

How Much is a PS5 now?

The RRP of a PS5 with one controller is around £449. Depending on the retailer this can vary up to around £549 and Game have plenty of bundle deals from the digital only console at around £349 to extra accessories and disc console for around £749. It depends on what you want and how much you’re willing to spend.

How We Snagged a PS5 in March 2021

I will say that we got a bit lucky and that doing this process took months. More people are having more success purchasing though which is brilliant because like I am for the gamers, not the sellers trying to exploit people out of hundreds upon hundreds of extra money. Firstly, there’s a few apps you can download which send push notifications to your phone when stock is available. The App we used was ‘Hot Stock’ and you can turn notifications on for PS5’s and Xbox Series X depending on the console you’re looking for. It’s also worth checking Twitter for PS5 Restock. This is handy because they usually have pretty good sources for when stock will drop with certain retailers. Using this in conjunction with the app can be really handy for securing the console you want.

We got lucky purchasing our PS5 recently. We knew that stock would be dropping on Very at some point. Twitter suggestted it would be around 10.30am on the Wednesday morning. Retailers seem to drop some of their stock, which does sell out in moments, then wait an hour or so before releasing more. I think this is to try and help eliminate the bot problem. We have the very app so when stock dropped it was a case of ensuring we were signed in and keep pressing refresh. The lone PS5 console sold out really quickly however Adam managed to spot one available with a 365 days of PS+ gift card. It seems to be purchasing a Playsation 5 with another item such as a gift card may be the way to secure a console.

Then we had to play the waiting game to see when our order would be accepted. It took while and so we were in doubt for a little bit to see if the order had actually gone through but within about an our the order confirmaton came through to our email. It was stressful but I’m really glad we didn’t end up paying well over the odds for the console. I think we ended up paying £509 in total but as it was on Very and we had credit available we can spread the cost a little easier. Also, I think this made the purchase a bit smoother because we didn’t need to apply for credit like you do with Currys to spread the cost and we didn’t have to enter card details.

Once the order had processed and the amount had been deducted from our account balance the purchase was locked in. We were given a delivery date of 31st March. However, on the Friday afternoon another email came through which informed us that our order had been dispatched and we were given tracking for Royal Mail. I thought this would just be the gift card because usually Very use Yodel. However, on Tuesday 16th March our PS5 was delivered by Royal Mail from Very. We have been using this method of stock checking and push notifications since January however, we haven’t been refreshing when stock notifcations have come through at 3am because, well, just no thank you. However, other people have been lucky this way.

So to summarise –
1. Follow stock accounts on Twitter and check in with their updates regularly.
2. Get an app with push notification set up.
3. Have an account with various retailers such as Currys, AO, Smyths, Game set up and logged in with an address and card details saved for a check checkout.
4. Act fast when a notifcation comes through and try and get a console with an add on if you can

I hope this has been helpful. I know it’s stressful when you really want a PS5 and just feel like paying a king’s ransom on eBay but don’t despair!

What games are currently available on PS5?

There isn’t a huge amount *right now* but then there never really is. I expect some games have also found themselves having to delay due to Covid. But there are some really good games available which make a PS5 worth having, some eagerly anticipated games coming and the best thing is it’s backwards compatible for PS4 games with some even getting a free PS5 upgrade. I’ve upgraded my AC Valhalla and if anything the quicker load time makes it completely worth it. I’m a huge fan of Final Fantasy so seeing that there is going to be an extra episode featuring Yuffie in between waiting for Remake Part 2 is pretty exciting and I’m really looking forward to upgrading this to the PS5 graphics. We also have Cyberpunk and Call of Duty Black Ops Cold War which are avaulble as a PS5 upgrade. We didn’t install the PS4 Cyberpunk version because of all the issues reported so I’m glad we held out but again it’s been months since we’ve been able to play anything new really.

We are currently playing the Demon’s Souls remake which is kind of the remake I didn’t know I needed for the PS5. The graphic upgrade is absolutely amazing. The souls games are some of my favourites despite how bloody difficult they can be. It’s so nice to go back into this world ten years on and relive the challenge. We’ve also got SpiderMan Miles Morales to play which looks really good. Anticipated PS5 games we are exicted about include Resident Evil village. We really wanted a PS5 before the 8th game in the Resident Evil world due out in May 2021 and something we have now been able to preorder. I’m also really excited for Horizon Forbidden West and Final Fantasy 16. It will probably be a great few years for exciting video games.

March 19, 2021
Lockdown & Ninety Seven Percent

I was inspired to write this after seeing a poem on Instagram by @thelizaparadox who wrote an amazing original poem that rang so true with me. I don’t really do poetry to be honest. It kind of went off on a tangent about how I don’t like the goverment but you know that’s how I am.

I don’t understand why the people in charge
Continue to see us stopped on a march
Or vigil, or protest, or from simply existing
Being someone like me feels like a terrible thing
At times, but I want to speak up
Things need to change, we have had enough

When ninety-seven percent of women are scared
To walk home, alone, in the dark, so prepared
For violence, harrasment, catcalling and shouts
Quickening foosteps behind them might pounce
So we carry keys tightly clenched between fingers
Walk quickly, well lit, flat shoes, don’t linger

This government say they do all that they can
For safety, equality; it’s all in their plan
But we don’t seem to triumph, we are still asking why
And we’re told it’s our fault, chin up, don’t cry

When it’s so hard to find twenty quid a week
To help feed the needy, the poor and the weak
But easy to fund a failing system
Of tracking and tracing covid symptoms
The kids can go hungry, but ministers well fed
With heavily subsidised food and drinks instead
Those who are priveledged will say ‘not my taxpayers money’
Because they’re conditioned to think that the poor are not worthy
For the basic standard of living that they take for granted
With single mums working two jobs are told they’ll get shafted

Our healthworkers and nurses are so underpaid
Despite a pandemic their pay is not raised
They’ve saved countless lives despite poor personal protection
From a virus that’s lead to so many infections
Where people can’t breathe, can’t move and will die
Our healthcare workers put their own lives on the line
To save who they can, to continue to work
Without breaks, loosing pay and the government smirks
They’ll clap and they’ll smile and they’ll tell them thanks
Whilst selling our healthcare system behind their backs

Minimum wage was supposed to help us all
To save for a home, a pension and crawl
Out of the gutter some find themselves in
But now those working are relying on tins
Donated from people, shelters and food banks
Whispers from strangers they’re poor cos they drank
Or the smoked, or took drugs or had too many kids
When they can’t afford it they should just get rid
But the cost of living has been unobtainable
Despite so many years of our ‘strong and stable’
Government in charge making cuts left and right
So many backed in a corner, struggling and can’t fight.

Social media’s alive with points of be kind,
I’m here, don’t struggle I won’t leave you behind
Celebrating international women’s day together
Then telling a woman you do not believe her
Because she’s saying she struggled and nobody helped her
So she’s an actress, a liar, and someone that’s rich
But she’s also a mother, so it could be a glich
In our soceity that likes to victimise women
Make them feel like they’re problems, and demons

Then when we protest and make ourselves heard
We are pinned down on the floor, this is absurd
That at the start of the week we were celebrating
But clearly too much because it has been baiting
A man’s ego because it’s not all men don’t you know
But ninenty seven percent of women to mow
Down and push to one side, out with the flow
Of paperwork, reports that do not get filed
In a justice system that acts so mild
Or even worse ruins a character
Of a victim that was brave to share what was the matter

March 16, 2021
The Problem with saying Violence Against Women and why #notallmen should be met with #toomanymen
The problem with violence against women is the removal of ‘male’ in a sentance that should read Male Violence Against Womxn to include cis women, trans men and women, non binary folx and basically anyone that has ever been a victim of assault because of their gender and/or sexuality. The problem with saying #notallmen is because that is nonwithstanding but victims of assualt shouldn’t have to say “OF COURSE ITS NOT ALL MEN!” – that’s obvious, but it is too many men. We are dealing with thousands of years of men growing up in a repetitive culture of believing women are second class citezins to them, that they are propriety and lets not forget that sex and gender equality are brand new laws. We’ve had laws in the UK for centuries upon centuries yet the laws for discrimination, equality and violence against women have been socialised within men since time began. There are parts of this world were non-binary is not a term used, where people are not free to define their sexuality, where they risk child marriage, clitoradectomies and genital mutilation (all because a man has decided that is how women should be). So it may not be all men, particularly in the UK where laws have changed but domestically and globally it is still too many men.

There is currently an open consultation for the home office regarding violence against women and girls. You can find a survey at the bottom of this page. Whatever your gender I ask you to fill this out. It had over 70,000 responses last Friday 12th March when it reopened. I didn’t even know it had been open before so I’m spreading the word whilst the consultation is open. It closes again on 26th March. Fill in the survery here.

The majority of violent crime is committed by men

Here in the UK the majority of all crime committed by males is 73% which is a pretty strong statistic when it comes to the #toomanymen response. Most all violent crime is committed by men (82% as of 2020). When it comes trends in relationships; violence against women 49% of the cases reported (and that’s key, because we know not all women report crime for fear or not being taking seriously) were an intimate partner. Further, a third of domestic violence cases (which doesn’t specify gender) were repeat victims which is just heartbreaking. Globally, 1 in 3 women experience physical or sexual violence. Half of women killed worldwide are killed by their partners or family. It’s just why is this still happening and what can we do to change it? Something that really concerned me was an Amnesty report in 2005 that said ‘Women who flirt are partially responsible for being raped’ – and that is the attitude that has got to change.

Harrasment, abuse and violence women experience needs to stop.

There are many women I personally know that have felt threatened or intimidated by a man, that have walked home in the dark with their keys between their fingers. We tell girls to take self defence classes, but to also be soft and gentle and not too muscly. There is such a double standard for women all to be appeasing for a man and quite frankly it is disgusting. I myself have been assualted by a man around the corner in daylight from my home. I’ve been a victim of domestic abuse and sexual assualt. I have been discriminated against, cat called and felt unsafe. I remember once going to a club with my mum and someone not leaving me alone until my mum stepped in. It’s like, why can’t the first no mean no? Why do unsolicited dick pics get sent? Why do men automatically go to slut shaming and abuse or slurs when a women turns him down? Why aren’t women allowed to say no to male advances?

Parents have a part to play in changing the language they use and the stereotypes they fall into to help challenge perceptions such as ‘girls do this and boys do that’.

So what can we do to change the situation? I mean I don’t think it’s completely up to women to stop violence against women but we do have a part to play because women can also be passive in this argument. Firstly, as mothers we can teach our children about consent and that no means no. We can teach children about consequence and action. We can also show our children respectful, loving relationships as adult role models. This is where it gets tough though because what of the cases where domestic abuse and domestic violence exists and their are children in the household, witnessing this, and then growing up believing that ‘women should be abused’ and ‘men should be violent’ – of course this isn’t always the case and not every child born will grow up to experience toxic relationships. As I said though, it’s not just down to women, men need to do the work too. Massive changes need to happen.

Sex education needs reformation. It isn’t just about STIs. It needs to discuss sexual violence, and consent in much more detail. These are impressionable young people and all genders need their perceptions challenged so we can stop blaming girls for being victims of sexual violence.

There needs to be a reform in sexual education which discusses consent for both boys and girls in a detailed way. No means no needs to be probably reinforced in each sexual education subject. This includes personal consent and that no one has permission to touch their bodies as well as a respect for other people. Within these lessons I think we should discuss, particularly for older teenagers, statistics of sexual violence including changing perceptions on this rape culture or that ‘women are asking for it because of x y and z’. Perhaps discussing these statistics will help challenge stereotypes and help reinforce the idea of consent and actually how rape can be a lifelong source of trauma for the person. We need to stop this perception that women want sex if they flirt, dress a certain way, wear makeup, have alcohol, walk home alone at night…because the perception is not there if a man flirts, is shirtless or has alcohol. Having these inclusive conversations and trying to break down the cycle with generations to come is going to ultimately help people understand the seriousness of male violence against women.

Call out friends who jump to violent and abusive threats after being rejected by someone they have hit on.

If a male hits on someone on a night out and that person rejects them (because they are allowed to say no) then the conversation should not automatically go to abuse, slurs or violence aimed at that person because they have rejected them. Like why is it okay for a woman to reject a man and him to automatically say ‘slag’ straight away and then laugh at her with their friends. In that conversation, if you, as a man, feel uncomfortable with your male friend using this language and you stay silent you are complicent in violence against women. You need to call out these behaviours and say this isn’t acceptable. You need to tell them to stop. You need to challenge their alpha male status and tell them that their behaviour, violence and unkindess because that friend isn’t going to have sex that night needs to change. Like, it’s awful. Honestly, break it down that person had their ego scratched and their answer is to hurl abuse at the person that said ‘no thank you I do not want your penis’ is just so fundamentally stupid. It’s so basic. ‘No sex thank you’ has turned into belittlement and violence against that women like come on just brush your ego aside and use your hand again. Better yet, be a better person that makes a woman want to go home with you.

Sex in Relationships Needs Communication. Sex is not currency. Sex should not be expected.

The perception that women ‘want a bad boy’ is a load of rubbish. Women do not want to be in a violent relationship, women want to be in a respected and healthy relationship. They may want to feel protected but that doesn’t mean controlled or abused. Women may like rough sex and kinky relationships but that doesn’t mean that they deserve to be a victim of sexual assualt and violence. Women are taught that sex is taboo for them. That is about pleasing a man, and that a man finishing is the end of sex. I know this is difficult when it comes to sex education but kids should be taught that both men and women masturbate. That sex needs foreplay. That sex is about intimacy between two people, and that it is not a currency in a relationship. It should be consentual, discussed, communicated and never, ever expected from a loving partner. It doesn’t matter if you have been in a relationship for one month or twenty years, you always ask for consent explicitly. You always wait for the yes to go ahead. You always communicate and if you are exploring something new you need to ask if it’s okay. We need to talk about sex more so that consent is within our bones and so that women don’t feel that they owe it to a man and men stop treating women as sexual objects.

An investigation by UN Women UK found that 97% of women aged 18-24 have been sexually harassed, with a further 96% not reporting those situations because of the belief that it would not change anything
https://www.openaccessgovernment.org/97-of-women-in-the-uk/105940/

No matter what you believe women do not feel safe here in the UK or globally. Women are told to do all these things to prevent violence against them but it still happens.

We can’t segerate men and women, that would be entirely backwards. It’s not solving the problem. It’s essentially saying men can’t control when they need and want to commit violent crime against women so they answer is to remove women from sight and it won’t happen. Of course it will. These crimes are committed because it’s a power thing. It’s about wanting to intimidate someone that is seen as inferior to the criminal. Women, non-binary, transmen, transwomen, and even young, softer men are at risk and should absolutely be protected. However, it’s the alpha male, toxic masculinity that needs to go alongside these perceptions we have that encourage us to blame the female victim of a violent crime.

Things that need to change: A Summary List
- Adult role models in respectful relationships challenging gender stereotypes and challenging their own perceptions so children and young people come to see their parents as equal people.
- A complete reform in sexual education taught at year 5 and year 10 in school. The younger focusing on bodily consent for boys and girls, the biological changes a body goes through, education on LGTBQTIA+ and what that means. Telling children that no one has permission to touch their bodies without their consent and that they also need to keep their hands to themselves. In year 10, focusing on consent again but alongside violence against women, challenging perceptions that what they see isn’t real life ie. pornographic images so that men don’t expect that kind of sexual behaviour and that women don’t feel they have to be that way.
- Challenging sexism in the workplace and calling out friends that use aggressive language to insult women or continous sexist jokes. We need to stop thinking it’s a funny issue. Sexism isn’t funny.
- The worst thing you can do is stay silent. If you are scared of telling your friend to stop saying something because of how they will react then you need to question why you are friends with that person.
- Ask before you sent intimate pictures to someone you don’t know and respect their answer. In fact, maybe don’t randomly message women and girls you don’t know on social media. Leave that to the dating apps and even when you do you still need consent.
- Stop saying #notallmen like we don’t know what we are talking about. Instead, be that not all men and challenge these perceptions to your fellow man.
- Learn about feminism. Educate yourselves. Read women’s stories about violence against them.
Sources of Information
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/articles/thenatureofviolentcrimeinenglandandwales/yearendingmarch2020
https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-informed/about-sexual-violence/statistics-sexual-violence/
https://www.openaccessgovernment.org/97-of-women-in-the-uk/105940/
https://www.gov.uk/government/consultations/violence-against-women-and-girls-vawg-call-for-evidence
March 16, 2021
Why Greek Mythology makes me want to visit Greece

Ad – This is a collaborative post.

Greece has always been one of those destinations I’ve been itching to travel to. As a child when I began learning about Greek mythology I slowly became obsessed with the Greek Dieties, myths and legends. In college I choose Ancient History as one of my topics to study and learning of the battles and philosophers to come from Greece just kept inspiring me. As an adult I find myself gravitating to stories and retellings based on these myths. I am eager to travel there and visit these places that still have structures and buildings of ancient times. To walk on the ground where these myths are said to have taken place would be extraordinary. I did have the opportunity to visit a few years ago and stay on the island of Zakynthos with my family but shortly after booking found out I was pregnant and I would be too far in my pregnancy to travel.

Where to go in Greece

For me, the obvious choice is, and has always been the island of Crete. It’s been somewhere I have wanted to visit for years. The weather in Crete is supposed to be quite pleasent in the summer months making it an ideal choice for a sunny family holiday. For me, I just think seeing these old ancient structures and feeling like part of the land and walking through history would be a little nicer to do in the summer half of the year rather than the cooler, wintery time, although I wouldn’t rule out travelling to Crete in October. I feel like it’s a great place to start when searching for the myths and legends of ancient Greece as Crete was where King Minos had his Labyrinth where Theseus used his golden thread to find the centre, fight the mintoar, and escape. The Minoan Palace or Palace of Knossos can be find on Crete and to walk among these ruins would just be amazing. Another location drenched in mythology on the island of Crete is Mount Ida. Here it is said that Rhea hid Zeus in a cave away from the titan Chronos (because he kept eating his kids!) to grow up unscathed and unharmed, eventually to overthrow his titan parents and form the pantheon of Gods we know today. How amazing to step into a place where the king of the Gods was thought to grow up.

Delos was a sacred island to the Gods and would be an ideal place for those wanting to travel to these fantastical locations. Delos is said to be the twin deities Artemis and Apollo’s birthplace. There are old ancient temple ruins around the island where the people of Greece used to visit to worship the pantheon. Another place that would be amazing to visit is the Archeron RIver which just looks abasolutely stunning. It is located within Epirus and is said to be the river that borders the underworld. The Archeron river itself, one of five rivers within Hades’ realm, also thought to be the River of Woe to lead spirits into the underworld. There was apparently an ancient temple dedicated to the worship of Hades and Persephone, known as a Nekromanteion, along the border of the river and said to be the entrance into the underworld itself.

For fans of the legend of Achilles Aegina is an interesting destination. Achilles had a fearsome group of soldiers known as the Myrmidons are said to orginate from this island. They were incredibly strong and loyal to their leader and Achilles’ links to the island, and it’s people, comes from his father Peleus who was banished from the island of Aegina. Some of these soldiers followed him and stayed with him, and then his son for the Trojan war. You can also visit the supposed home of the Gods in Greece, Mount Olympus. It’s the highest peak in the country and offers ideal locations for hiking and glorious scenic views. The ancient city-state of Thebes is another location that exists today, although now known as Thiva, it is said to be the birth place of Herakles and the party all night form a cult kinda God Dionysus.

Two other islands within Greece are ideal destinations for sunny holiday lovers and myth hunters alike. These are Papthos, on Cyprus, which legend claims is where Aphrodite first walked when she rose from the sea in a scallop shell. I only ever see that famous painting when I think of Aprhodite, the Goddess of all things Love and Beauty. It’s absolutely a place I would love to visit and spend a few glorious, sunny weeks swimming and travelling around. I’d love to visit the remains of her ancient temple on the island of Paphos. The other island I’d love to visit with links to Mythology is Corfu which was named after another Nymph, Korkya. There are just so many beautiful places around Greece with these wonderful ruins that I think I would find interesting and inspiring on my hunt for mythological sites.

March 12, 2021
Celebrating Valentines Day with Moonpig (Ad)

Ad – Sharing some of the gifts that Moonpig have to offer to help you celebrate love in lockdown this Valentines Day
Celebrating Valentines Day with Moonpig Moments

I’ve always thought of Moonpig as a convinient way to send cards to friends and family online however they are so much more than that now. Moonpig has a huge range of celebration cards alongside a range of gorgeous gifts to celebrate any special occasion. I am collaborating with Moonpig to share some of the gifts that make ideal options for a lovely night in this Valentines Day.

I think this is mine and Adam’s 9th Valentines Day now and with kids, lockdown and just general time passing we haven’t really done much just the two of us for a long time. I think the last time we had a date night was in November 2019. We went to see Dave Gorman in Basingstoke and had such a good night. I think it was also the first time we had been in the car as a couple too as Adam had only bought it six months prior. It will be nice to have an evening together despite the circumstances. Moonpig sent a range of gifts for us to try to set the mood for a date night in including a candle, flowers, fizzy bath slabs, some Gin and a date night in gift card to try for some games which should be fun.

Moonpig have a selection of gifts available for Valentines Day

We are both quite introverted people and homebodies so staying in together with a film, some good food and the kids in bed is absolutely fine with us. A digital games night is something a bit different and I’m sure will be fun for us. A hot bath with some scented bath slabs sounds ideal and the flowers are a gorgeous Spring bouquet that I am trying very hard to look after. Moonpig have a lovely selection of gifts and cards to suit any couple and need. I was pleased to see the bath crumbles were vegan. There were also a selection of chocolates and hampers, other drinks and beautiful rose bouquets. The card selection is fantastic with loved up romantic cards and so many that had me howling with laughter too.

February 1, 2021