Do you have any Godchildren? I don’t. I’ve never been asked, which is absolutely fine with me because to be honest it’s just going to be an awkward conversation. Most of my mum friends came after children had been had. I’m not really in touch with many people from school, let alone close enough to be considered a Godparent and those that I am friends with don’t have kids of their own yet. I don’t come from a particularly religious family although I was Christened when I was young. My sister was too. Then my youngest sister came along and she wasn’t as a baby. She did decide to get Christened when she was older because she wanted presents but I don’t think I went. I think I was living away from home at that point. Since then there have been other family Christenings that I haven’t gone to and I decline the invitation on principle. I don’t agree with them.
I always start thinking about things like this around this time of year, with Easter just around the corner. I don’t really know what to do with Easter. I get Evie a chocolate egg but other than that it’s the same as any other Sunday except Adam doesn’t have to work. I don’t cook a big dinner and the fact that shops are closed just means we’re stuck inside and need to makesure we aren’t low on anything the day before. I don’t even really talk that much about the Easter bunny although he seems to be held in high esteem according to Evie. It’s a bit different to Christmas, because I’m all about the presents. I don’t really care if that makes me a bit hypocritical but Christmas has never been about anything that being with family to me. We don’t go to Church, we don’t do Midnight Mass, we don’t thank anyone for dinner except the person that’s cooked it. I’ve watched Evie’s school nativity plays and I’ve been to her Christmas shows at the Church. I’m happy she’s learned about what Christmas was about and what Easter is about but that doesn’t mean it’s all true…
Evie wasn’t Christened, despite her dad’s family being Catholic. I felt a lot of pressure and was asked ‘Why’ quite a lot and had to be really firm in my answer. I do worry that she has been Christened in secret since I left my ex but it’s never a subject I’ve asked and one I don’t really need to find out the answer to. I find them pointless. I know a lot of people do them for traditional reasons, as a way to get family together and all of that but for me, personally, that’s not good enough. When you decide to Christen a baby you are agreeing to bring them up as a Christian, something I am not, although that isn’t why disagree with Christenings. I disagree with them because I see it as making a decision for someone else that really doesn’t affect you in anyway. It’s a lot different when the child comes to you and says “I believe in God, I want to be Christened and I want to learn all about it.” Fine, that is their choice. Although, in all honesty, I don’t think I’d be able to organise that for them. I wouldn’t want to be a part of it because I would feel like a complete fraud.
Maybe this makes me a little selfish, but for the same reasons I won’t ever agree to be a Godparent to someone else’s child. I’m not going to stand there and confirm to bringing up a child in the eyes of a God I don’t believe in. I don’t really want to be a part of it at all. I don’t agree with taking away a choice where faith is such a personal thing. For the same reasons, I won’t be Christening any children I have. I won’t be selecting Godparents for this baby. This has actually caused upset before, and I’m sorry for that, but ultimately, it just goes against everything I believe in. When this baby is here I’m sure we’ll see lots of family and friends in the weeks afterwards and introduce them to our baby. I’m sure we will receive lots of wonderful congratulations and cards. I’m sure everyone will be excited. For me, that’s enough. That’s enough of a celebration for a new life. For me, there’s no need for a Christening, a naming day or any other big celebration like that because to be honest I really can’t be bothered with it all.
I really love reading. There’s a real sense in pleasure at opening up a new book and getting right into a story alongside the feeling of achievement and sadness when it’s finished. Sometimes though, especially with pregnancy, I just don’t have the energy to read much more than a few pages a night. That is where Audiobooks come in nicely for me! For the last year I’ve loved using my Bookbeat subscription which has so many audiobooks and stories to listen to.
There are lots of compelling listens on Bookbeat which is available as a free App on the App store. You simply pay a monthly fee and can listen to as many books as you like. New audiobooks are really easy to find too with different sections and catergories, Sunday Times best sellers and brand new stories available too. I’ve got my eye on a few audiobooks where friends have read them and really recommended them so it’s great to see there are new audiobooks available rather than just titles I’ve not heard of. There are plenty of titles I haven’t read or listened to yet on Bookbeat however it’s been a real pleasure finding new authors whilst using the app. You can find a whole host of categories from young adult, fantasy, autobiography, informative and thrillers. Here are some of my favourites:
Game of Thrones – Now, I’ve read all the books and watched the series but I’ve loved having a listen to series audiobooks to see if there are any plot lines I’ve missed out.
The Selection – This is a young adult fiction series set way in the future where people are kept segregated. It really shows the divide of the rich and poor. This features the tale of America Singer who is selected as a prospective candidate to marry the Royal Prince. There’s plenty of action with rebel group attacks, romance and a few thrills along the way too.
Carve the Mark – a really interesting book and well worth a listen
The Hobbit – Another fantasy favourite of mine that brings me right back to my childhood
Those are just a few of my favourite listens that I’ve enjoyed. I usually take advantage of listening to audiobooks in the evening whilst drifting off to sleep. With Bookbeat you usually need a WiFi connection to listen in however you do have the option of downloading some stories too which gives you the ability to listen offline. I find this perfect for anytime I’m travelling or even something to listen to on the walk up to school. Audiobooks are a great way to find new listens, new authors and new stories and it’s something I’ve loved using and would recommend to anyone. I love the flexibility of not having to download the audiobook direct to the device and listening through WiFi as this stops my phone using up too much memory. There are plenty of stories for the whole family too which means we can all find something we like.
Pregnancy and Maternity Wishlist for Plus Size Women
Since finding out I am pregnant I’ve been reluctant to buy anything for this pregnancy or baby but now I’ve had my first scan and we’ve finished the first trimester I finally feel ready and less anxious about the things I know I’m going to need and want during this pregnancy. Having a baby puts a lot of strain on your body and comfort is so important, as well as taking care of yourself. Then there are all the things you need for the baby too. Right now though, whilst I’m growing a human I am going to focus on what I want and what is going to make things easier for me over the next six months.
I do have a small list of first trimester essentials which might help you during those early days with morning sickness and keeping fit and well:
A bedroom fan to keep cool during the night
Comfortable PJs and a dressing gown – particularly useful on Snow Days when you can’t leave the house – we had a few of these!
Peppermint Tea
Ginger biscuits
Pregnancy Vitamins with Folic Acid + Vitamin D
Smoothies – a good way to get in some vitamins and a bit of energy
A reusable water bottle
Things I Need for my Pregnancy
I’m passed the first trimester and into the second which, if I remember rightly and if this pregnancy is going to continue being much like my first, was actually a really nice part. I didn’t suffer with many symptoms, my energy was up and the anxiety from the first part was mostly gone. I didn’t really do much research into things I would want for my first pregnancy and with Adam being the dad and everything being new to him as well as there being seven years between this and my first pregnancy, I kind of feel like I get to start again and experience things again properly. My last relationship was not as positive as this one and the in laws took over a bit. I think they felt they were overcompensating for the fact that I was so far from my family, and they did help a lot but it got a bit overbearing and I didn’t really feel like anything was my choice. Anyway, I digress…lets go shopping!
Pregnancy Support Pillow
Picture from Amazon. Available on Amazon – http://amzn.to/2FPdrwEPicture from Amazon. Available to buy on Amazon – http://amzn.to/2phc6aQ
There are so many to choose from and I did have one of these before which became a necessity for me in the later months of pregnancy. I sleep on my tummy and I know that soon I’m going to have to switch onto my side. The best position for sleeping when pregnant is on your left side with legs bent and a pillow between them. Having a proper pregnancy pillow can also support your growing bump and back too. I had a sort of triangle support pillow during my pregnancy with Evie which I could then go on to use as a breastfeeding support pillow and that really helped! I really like the long snuggle one which I think would give excellent support due to me being overweight as well as being a great support with breastfeeding when the baby is here with us. There are lots of great pregnancy support pillows available ranging in size, length and style. Some have built in dips for back support, some are designed just for support between your legs and some are brilliant for added neck support or lifting your legs. You will find one that is best for you and your needs but it is absolutely an essential for me.
Maternity Bras
Image from Figleaves – HOTMILK Eclipse Full Cup Non Wired Nursing Bra
I’m currently measuring at a 42G so maternity bras are going to be an absolute essential for me. I actually miss nursing bras, they were so comfortable however with a bigger size comes a bigger price. Colour is not really going to bother me but comfort is key. I need wide straps for good support and preferably I want to ditch the underwire. They always end up jabbing me in the side boob anyway after a few wears so lets just be done with it. For those that don’t need such a massive size then the usual places like Mothercare have some great options. Luckily Figleaves have loads of fantastic maternity and nursing bras between £30-£54 for my size and I’m hoping to use them to grab my maternity and nursing bras a little later down the line. My boobs have actually been quite tender this pregnancy and incredibly sensitive which is not something I really remember during my last pregnancy and not something I’ve ever suffered with during my periods. I think a good, cotton, wire free support bra is going to help this.
Image from Figleaves – ANITA Comfort Jana Cotton Support Bra
I am not really too bothered about colour either. Black, white or nude seem to be the standard for my size so I’m pretty happy with the choices. As I said, comfort is key. It’s a good idea to go and get yourself measured. You can do this yourself at home or you can go into store. The best time to measure for a nursing bra is around 8 months pregnant.
Maternity Swimwear
I am hoping to go to lots of Aqua Fit and Aqua Bumps classes for as long as I feel able to. I want to do this to help me try and loose some body fat, avoid putting on too much weight and to help reduce any strain. I love swimming, always have, and I really should continue to make good use of my gym membership! For the meantime I have got myself a size 22 Swimdress from George at Asda however as time goes on I think I will look into a maternity swimsuit to accommodate for a growing bump. My problem is that the majority of these swimsuits are halter neck tops which is just not suitable for my breasts. Halter necks never give me enough support and I’m always at risk of popping out. Not something you want during aqua fit. So far the best find is online at Asda and is available in my size and is a lovely dark blue, polka dot swimsuit available in sizes up to 26. I’m hoping to get myself this soon before it disappears never to be seen again. I like the blue polka dots, I like that it’s in my size and the swim dress just makes it a bit more flattering.
With my last pregnancy I didn’t really have any maternity clothes. I just wore the same stuff in a bigger size. I think that’s the thing with being overweight, you don’t really have a noticeable bump for a really long time. I do, however, want to find some decent maternity leggings and a few long tops or jersey dresses. I am absolutely a leggings and a dress kind of woman and luckily these seem to be available year round so I’m not too worried about finding something to wear. A lot of women I have spoken to swear my maternity jeans and how comfortable they are.
Pregnancy Journal & Baby Record Book
I sadly lost my baby book I kept during pregnancy and in Evie’s early days due to moving away so I really want to try and document as much as I can through my pregnancy in the book and the baby’s first milestones. I’m so glad I have this blog to do that too and write down all my thoughts and feelings – hopefully helping others who are pregnant too. Adam and I actually got this one quite a while ago and it’s been in storage since. It was nice to pull it out and finally start using it. I believe I picked this up from The Works in my local town one day whilst browsing.
Pregnancy and Motherhood Reading List
I do love a good book and a good read. I’m currently looking for books on Pregnancy Yoga, Hypnobirthing and I’d like to find something on Breastfeeding too. Any recommendations for any of those are really very welcome. Here is what I’ve found so far and what I’m currently reading:
This just never gets old! A funny take on pregnancy and parenting which I absolutely love.
I am really being drawn in to Hypnobirthing and mindfullness. I’m really hoping I can have a VBAC providing there are no issues throughout the pregnancy and this baby doesn’t wait until they are so overdue. Whatever the decision though I want to try and put these exercises in place to have as best birth I can whether that is through VBAC or Elective C-Section.
Right now I think they’re the essentials I would like to pick up throughout this pregnancy. I do have another list of things I’d love to have for the new baby and I’ll put that list together a little later down the line. We’ve got a bit of decluttering to do in the flat before we get any of the big baby stuff and we need to move our bedroom around a bit to fit in a cot. I am desperate for a Next to Me style Cot because they look great and are supposed to help a lot with breastfeeding. I also think it’s the only one we will be able to fit in our room! A full size cot would just be too big for us, so I think we’ll have to move before we make that purchase.
For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
I think I’ve been wearing glasses for the last ten years or so now. My eyes aren’t too bad and I need mine for distance however I usually need to use them if I’m working on the computer for a long time or watching television. I usually make sure my I order prescription sunglasses too but as I don’t drive I don’t really have a need for prescription sunglasses so it’s a bit unnecessarily. However, I do want to make sure my sunglasses are comfortable, stylish and protect my eyes from the harsh glare of the sun.
I am so happy to have recently received my brand new sunglasses from Perfectglasses.co.uk a site that makes getting prescription sunglasses and reading glasses simple. I’ve been looking for some new sunglasses for a while as the frames on mine have become quite loose which makes them really uncomfortable and slide off my face. Thankfully this has not happened with my new sunglasses which are actually a perfect fit. Looking for glasses online is pretty new for me as I usually get my sunglasses from my optician in town however there are times when you just want a quick fix. Perfect Glasses offer a huge amount of styles for prescription glasses and sunglasses with so many lovely frames to choose from. It was actually really challenging to find a pair that I wanted because there were so many I liked.
Ordering from perfect glasses was really simple. You can of course choose your desired frame and then add in your prescription for each lens. Usually when placing an order with glasses requiring a prescription the delivery can take a little longer than a regular pair of frames. I was told mine would take around 25 days to deliver however they did come a little before the deadline so I was thrilled. The sunglasses came with a lovely protective box and a good quality cleaning cloth to help keep the lenses clear.
I loved that there were a huge choice of designer glasses available to choose from too as I do usually go for a designer frame however when I found this gorgeous floral frame I was thrilled as they are exactly the sort of thing I would pick up in store. The frames are nice and thick and fit snugly around my face and tuck nicely behind my ears. The lenses are a lovely colour and do make it easier to see when outside in the sunshine. I find these have been particularly helpful on the few sunny afternoons we’ve had when walking up to get Evie from school. I have to walk up and down a few hills on the journey and I often find the sun in my eyes which is really annoying.
Overall I would recommend perfect glasses as an alternative as the process is really simple and the choice of frames available is really extensive.
Disclaimer: I received a pair of glasses and payment in exchange for this feature. All opinions remain my own.
Now I’ve finally announced our exciting news and that we are pregnant I wanted to give you a little run down on those first twelve weeks. I am 13 weeks pregnant today and that marks the end of the first trimester and whilst it’s been exciting it’s also been full of anxiety right up until I walked into the ultrasound room. Until I saw my baby and heard the sonographer say there was a heartbeat I was just really worried. It’s been a very long time since I was last pregnant and I really sort of forgot what that first trimester is really like! We actually found out on 17th January which is apparently the day that a lot of women find out they’re expecting. I’m sure you can guess why…and calculating from my last period I was around five weeks pregnant. I took a standard home pregnancy test and then called Adam in the middle of his Psychology class because I couldn’t wait until he got home at 1.30pm. We both were really excited and in turn told our mums.
How Have Things Been Going?
The first trimester is never the easiest. You can’t really feel any movement so other than a test and no period it’s not really been very obvious. I’m overweight too so there will be no bump to speak of because I already have a lot of fat around my stomach. Perhaps when we get to July or August I might actually look pregnant but I don’t think I really did when I had Evie and whilst I was a bit smaller than I am now, I still had a lot of tummy fat. Being pregnant with another child is harder but I’m really glad Evie is just that little bit older. Adam has also helped a lot with some of the school runs where I’ve just felt really exhausted. Having half term and the snow days helped a little too because it was a few more days I didn’t have to leave the house. We are all really excited and the family are too which is really nice. Adam only has his mum, nan and sister close by but they were so happy for us when we told them the news. I’m really glad to have my family much closer to me this time around too as I was 100 miles away from them when Evie was born.
Any Symptoms?
The first trimester is usually full of uncomfortable symtoms. Now this is what hasn’t really helped my anxiety very much because I’m one of those annoying women that don’t seem to get morning sickness. It hasn’t helped my anxiety because so many people say things like “Well at least with morning sickness I know the baby is there.” which has really been playing on my mind. However, not getting sick is completely fine with me as I suffer with emetophobia which is a really horrid anxiety around vomit. I am incredibly glad I don’t get morning sickness because just the feeling of feeling nauseous has been enough to set off my anxiety. I truly can not deal with sick at all. It causes horrible panic attacks for me. I know it seems really strange because no one likes being sick but it is so much worse when you have an actual fear of it. The nausea, thankfully, went around week seven and has stayed away since although there has still been some dry retching thanks to nasal congestion and how sensitive my sense of smell has become.
I’ve also had a few of migraines and a lot of headaches which is not uncommon for me. I did think at first it might be caffeine withdrawal as I was drinking a lot of diet coke alongside tea and coffee. It’s really horrible when you’re so restricted to just paracetamol and I’m really trying not to take it for every headache but it can be quite tough. Other than that I have again been really tired. I’ve had a few afternoon naps and have been often drifting off to sleep around 8pm most nights. This is starting to fade a little because I am waking up at really silly times in the morning and that isn’t helping the problem so I’m trying to keep busier in the evenings now I have a bit more energy back. Thankfully there has been no constipation this time around but I have felt really bloated and had some indigestion. This has been in the last few weeks more than throughout the entire first trimester but it’s very uncomfortable. I’ve been trying to drink 3 litres of water a day and have added in some herbal peppermint tea which has actually helped me quite a bit.
Being Overweight and Pregnant isn’t ideal…but I’m dealing with it and want to have as healthy a pregnancy as I can.
Any Cravings?
Sour fruit. Or just really juicy fruits which to be honest isn’t that bad a thing to crave. At least I’m getting in some extra vitamins although I’m trying not to have too much. I haven’t eaten as healthily as I would like but I am working on changing that and making our meals fresher and full of colour instead of opting for quick and easy options. I’ve got lots of slimming world recipes to use although I’m not going to be actively trying to loose weight but I am going to try and swim and walk more. I think this will really help a lot. My plan is to avoid putting on too much weight and hopefully lose a bit of body fat in the meantime. I’ve been completely put off sausages and bacon again which is something I had with Evie. Anything that smells really fatty when it’s being cooked makes me feel awful and I just can’t eat it. I was exactly the same with Evie, is this a sign I’m having another girl? Who knows. One thing I have noticed is I’ve gone from feeling nausea to super hungry in moments to the point I’ve had hunger pains. I’ve given in to a lot of junk food which has annoyed me and it’s something I want to avoid from now on so we aren’t buying it. I’ve written up my Pregnancy Wishlist.
Telling Evie
She was obviously the most important person to tell besides Adam. We had to tell her that sadly we wouldn’t be able to go on holiday to Greece with my mum now which we had planned to do at the start of September and she was really gutted about it. However, when we told her why she completely switched and was super excited. She has been so good at keeping the news a secret from her friends at school too and now she has finally been able to tell them and share her excitement with her teachers. I believe she actually said “Finally, I’m going to be a big sister!” before giving me a big hug. She’s going to make an awesome big sister.
Booking In Appointment
After finding our your pregnant the standard procedure is to book yourself in to the GP for your booking appointment. This is usually around 8-10 weeks and I was 9+6 when I had my appointment. Going through so many weeks of the first trimester without speaking to anyone was really hard though. Before the appointment I went and collected my Bounty pack which contained my notes so I could fill some of the details in before my appointment. My midwife is really nice. She was really reassuring and wasn’t negative or horrible about my weight which I was worried about. We talked briefly through my first pregnancy and labour with Evie and that I’d had an emergency c-section before. I’ll be under consultant care again because of my c-section and a high BMI of 45. I was expecting my BMI to actually be nearer 50 to be honest so I was glad it wasn’t that high. There is so much paperwork to fill in and then the blood tests. All of which have come back absolutely fine which I’m glad about.
I encourage new mums to be as informed as possible so I’ve written a post on books I think you should read when pregnant.
First Scan
I had my first scan at 12+5 weeks at my local hospital although that won’t be the hospital I’ll be giving birth in because it only has a birth centre and I need to be on a site with a theatre. Where I live I had two hospitals to choose from and I’m happy with my choice. My appointment was early in the morning which I was glad about. Being so overweight for the scan I had to hold my tummy up to give them access and the sonographer was pushing down really hard. This actually lead to a little bit of a bleed from my c-section scar which is 7 years old. The bleeding stopped within a day and there’s no infection apparent, I’m not in any pain and I’ve cleaned and dried the area a few times since having the scan with salt water baths. I think it was me maybe holding too tightly, being anxious and the pressure that caused the scan to be quite painful which I wasn’t expecting. I did get a photo although it isn’t very clear because of the restricted view due to my BMI. Having a full bladder did help and the sonographer saw the baby move the head, measured from crown to rump and from what they could see there were no issues. However, I could not have the nuchal screening because the view was so restricted. I’m going back in two weeks for another scan so that the sonographer can get the head circumference and take some more measurements. I’ll be 14+4 weeks at that point so hopefully with a slightly bigger baby things will be easier to spot and it won’t be as uncomfortable.
So there you have it, my mammoth update for the first trimester. I’ll be writing a few updates around my pregnancy and how I’m getting on over the next six months which probably won’t be as huge as this one! I’m now looking forward to enjoying my pregnancy and meeting this new baby. You can now catch up with my 16 Week Check Up too.
For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
