Candyfloss & Dreams

Author: Kat Candyfloss

My Birth Plan for Baby Number 2
I’ve talked before about why I think writing a birth plan for every pregnancy is important. Lots of comments said that so many women didn’t bother for subsequent children, especially after a straightforward first birth or they just had a few preferences. I think birth planning becomes a bit more of an obsession when you’ve had a traumatic birth because you want to avoid the same thing happening and ultimately reflect more positively on the situation.

I do agree that birth can be really unpredictable and it is wise to consider options B and C however I personally can not just accept “going with the flow” as it is likely I’ll always be at risk of another c-section for this and future births. It’s very hard for me to just go with the flow when major abdominal surgery will always be part of the plan.

I wanted to share my birth plan for my ideal birth and touch on how I’m trying to turn it into a positive experience however I am also going to share my plans for a hospital transfer and in the case of needing a planned or unplanned c-section. My hope is that you can pick up some of these to add into your own birth plans or there might be some considerations that you hadn’t thought of yet. I’m also currently writing a book on having a high BMI and being pregnant and why individualised care is absolutely key when you’re in that situation.

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Creating Birth Plans A, B & C

So birth plan A is a home upright, forward and open VBAC Waterbirth using hypnotherapy and gas and air.

Plan B is an active and upright vaginal birth with or without assistance following a transfer to hospital for whatever reason. I’m still happy for gas and air, Hypnobirthing and might consider pethidine or diamorphine if I feel it’s needed however I want to avoid an epidural.

Plan C is the planned c-section with spinal block at 42 weeks if I am not already in labour or the unplanned c-section with spinal block or general anaesthetic in an emergency following any difficulties and where the safety of myself and my baby are compromised.

Risk of Scar Weakening or Rupture

The risk of scar rupture is around 1 in 200 so it is not common place and the scar is more likely to weaken or slightly open than actually rupture. I need to be aware of:
- Pain in between contractions
- Referred pain in my shoulder
- A sense of feeling of something being wrong or not feeling right
- Vaginal bleeding
Any of these will mean a direct transfer to my booked in hospital. The risk here from home is the transfer time of course and is a risk I acknowledge which is why the midwife attending me at home will be looking for these symptoms closely.

Things that help avoid scar weakening
- Length of time between pregnancy – 8 years
- Placenta away from the scar site – mine is no where near my old very neat scar
- Shorter labours – something I can’t control but as my uterus has done it before there is no reason why my labour should drag on and I should labour just like any other second time mother.
- Positioning – being upright with gravity on my side
- No hormonal/syntocinon/epidural induction.
There aren’t many home birth vbacs in my hospital trust area, especially those with a high BMI so it’s really hard to know what my chances are of a successful vbac however the evidence does suggest that women that do plan a Home birth are more successful at having one and those that plan for a vbac at home are more successful at having them at home or at hospital.i therefore have had three lengthy discussions with a consultant midwife who has put a midwifery care action plan in place for the midwife attending me at a home birth and to help with making my labour positive in hospital.

Guidelines recommend that a VBAC woman comes into hospital for continuous monitoring but if they want to birth at home they can and the transfer threshold to hospital should be lower. In the case of Home births with a high BMI around 58% of women are transferred into hospital at some point either at their own request, prolonged labour or in an emergency. This is why it’s even more important for me to have a birth plan.

Birth Plan A – Home VBAC Waterbirth

Pros – in my own environment, feel safer, no need to rush to and from hospital, can labour and birth in water if I want to.

Cons – transfer time to hospital or waiting for an ambulance.

At home I will have access to water, gas and air, TENS, food and drink. I have bags packed just in case of a transfer and so Adam knows where everything is. We will have shower curtains and tarp to protect furniture. Large TENA pads for the bed and sofa. I will have a fan and portable heater to adjust the temperature in the room. We will have plenty of space in the bathroom to birth the placenta – apparently using a pan and sitting on the loo is a perfect place to do this for a physiological first stage.

Early labour signs that the plan is to have a whole grain carb meal for energy, inform labour line that things are beginning, get adam home and arrange childcare for Evie if needed and inform my Doula, a warm bath, take two paracetamol and go to sleep – labour will wake me up!

Continue to inform labour line whilst contractions progress, watch funny comedy videos on Netflix and build a Lego set. Trust me there is a method to my madness here – anything that makes you feel good will make you labour better. Eat what I want and drink isontonic drinks for energy.

When I need to focus on contractions use birthing ball, TENS and hypnobirthing tracks remain in an upright and active position. Consider filling up the pool at this point and when contractions are three in ten minutes lasting a minute ask for a midwife to attend. Avoid getting in the pool until midwife arrives and allow a cervical examination.

Try and wait until 8cm/transition to get into the pool and remain in active, upright position. It is estimated that a second time mum will dilate from 5cm to 10cm within around five hours or one hour for 1cm.

Birth Plan B – Following Hospital Transfer

Pros – emergency equipment available if needed, no need to wait for transfer time

Cons – unfamiliar, sterile environment, likely to have more interruptions and midwives I’ve never met

If I transfer to hospital I am asking for intermittent monitoring to continue as I feel being strapped to a bed will really limit my ability to labour the way I want as I plan to remain mobile, upright and active. Transferring to hospital usually means no eating in case of an unplanned c-section, so drinking for energy is going to be key. I’ll be bringing isotonic drinks, chewable glucose tablets and honey as well as some chocolate for after birth. I have requested wireless monitoring if continuous monitoring is required and a room with a large shower so that I still have access to water for pain relief. I have also rejected having a cannula inserted as a precaution and do not want an epidural. I am happy to use gas and air and might consider pethidine or diamorphine if labour is taking a long time.

When it comes to assisted delivery I believe remaining upright, forward and open will be the best position for me and my hospital has floor mats and birth balls available. However, if baby needs to be born then I will accept methods of assisted delivery offered.

Birth Plan C – C-Section Birth

Pros – baby is delivered.

Cons – major surgery, more scar tissue, more risk of rupture for subsequent pregnancies, theatre environment, lots of people.

In the event of a c-section I am still requesting the following:
- Optimal cord clamping
- Skin to Skin in theatre
- Delay weighing and measuring until first breastfeed
- Second APGAR on my chest
- Baby born slowly and gently
General Birth Plan and Preferences

1st Stage of Labour – Dialation.

Consider the environment for the best possible production of Oxytocin and base this on my senses. Create space for the birth pool and a birth nest. This can also be transferred into labour ward as much as possible.

Smell – favourite aromatherapy oils

Touch – water, soft textures

See – low lighting, family photos, birth affirmations

Taste – favourite treats, frozen grapes, warm lemon and honey drinks, isotonic drinks

Hear – hypnobirthing track, hushed, empathetic voices

2nd Stage of Labour – Pushing

Breathe Baby Down

No coached pushing

Upright position, preferably in water for buoyancy and most comfort

Skin to skin after birth

3rd Stage of Labour – Physiological (if all is well)
- Birth placenta without injection unless excessive bleeding
- Optimal cord clamping – wait until the cord has changed colour and stopped pulsating
- Golden hour of skin to skin contact, breastfeeding and delay weighing and measuring
For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
September 4, 2018
Hiring a Doula Despite a Low Income
Having a Doula in this pregnancy has been invaluable. However, despite it being something extra, it has been necessary for me, not a luxury. It’s a service that I am fully away not every woman can afford however I wanted to share with you a few ways in which you can either afford Doula support, or, at least share with you why I think for my pregnancy and my circumstances it has been invaluable and, well, priceless. I hired my Doula when I was around 12 weeks pregnant and for me, the support, encouragement and conversations have really helped me have a lovely, positive pregnancy.

Hiring My Doula Sophie

When I first approached my now Doula I was pretty upfront and honest about my financial circumstances because I didn’t want to waste her time really. She got back to me fairly quickly and suggested we meet for a chat, or an interview, so I could get to know her, see if we clicked and how she could help me in this pregnancy. During the interview we discussed a payment plan which was affordable for me and, because I had booked her quite early in my pregnancy it has made the payments really manageable. Obviously, I won’t be going in to detail on how much I’m paying because it’s a private agreement between us but Sophie was really empathetic and told me that she believes Doula support should be available to as many women that want it and she was willing to work with her clients to make that support as affordable as possible.

Money aside, having Sophie by my side throughout this pregnancy has just been amazing. We have had plenty of phone conversations, texts and emails. Sophie has been supportive, encouraging and really helped me any time I’ve had a bit of a wobble by talking things through with me. She is calm, approachable, friendly and I feel really comfortable around her. We are coming close to my Doula On Call period now as I’m approaching full term which means that we will have more regular contact as I get closer to labour. Sophie, as my doula, has not offered medical advice but has helped me find places I can do my own reading and research. She has helped me to make confident, informed decisions and has been my yes person. Because of this every conversation I have had with my consultant and midwives have been really positive. I honestly believe that because I’ve had another supportive Yes person in my life that I have come across at these appointments as more informed and that in turn has really helped me to plan a birth I am feeling calm and confident about.

The Benefits of Having Doula Support In My Pregnancy

No longer am I focusing on the negative experience I had before but I am really looking forward to my birth. I’m not naive, I have a scar, I know there are risks and I know that the biggest issue for the NHS is my BMI rather than the fact I am attempting a VBAC. I am not expecting it to be painless but I do honestly believe that I will cope so much better throughout labour. I believe that I will be able to make calm, confident decisions because I know more about the risks and benefits of every choice. More than anything I know how labour starts and I know how negative fear is for labour and birth. For that reason I am really confident I will be able to have my home water birth however I also feel that if I need to transfer into hospital, I will still have the VBAC I want. Having a doula has helped me become more confident, more assertive when it comes to my choices and decisions and have a birth plan I’m happy with. I know there is every possibility that things might go differently, and that is completely okay because not only will I have Adam with me, but I will also have a Doula with me that will support my decisions and be my advocate when I might not be able to speak up for myself.

Tips on Affording a Doula on a Low Income

I have had a few women say to me that they wish they could have afforded a Doula so I wanted to share a few tips with how you might be able to come to an agreement that works for you.
1. Do your research. Doula’s are self employed, offer different packages at different prices. Look to find ones that are within your budget.
2. Book in early. The earlier you book in with a Doula the more options you have for things like a payment plan. Plus you’ll get more support and that can only be a good thing.
3. Consider a newly qualified Doula. They will be really enthusiastic and prices will reflect that they are newly trained. In my experience, Doula’s usually seem to be mothers themselves and want to support women more because they passionately believe in positive birth experiences.
4. Be honest. If you are on a low income speak to her, she may offer a low income discount and a more affordable payment plan for you.
5. Is there anything you can offer in return? A service you provide for an exchange of services? I’ve heard some Doula’s do offer this because, again, they want to help women and they want to make their support affordable. If you can both find a way to make things mutually exclusive don’t be afraid to bring that up when you meet and discuss fees. I have heard independent midwives can also offer this sort of service too, because, they are self employed and because the passion for helping is really high on their list of priorities.
6. Be reasonable. As I’ve said Doula’s are self employed and whilst they want to help, they don’t want to feel robbed or cheated. Excitement, love and passion for their job is huge for them but it is also how they earn money.
For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.
August 30, 2018
36 Weeks Pregnant Update

36 Weeks Pregnant and in those final stages of the third trimester now where everything is persistently getting a little bigger, a little harder and more uncomfortable. I have to admit this week I have struggled and it’s been really hard. Not because I want to not be pregnant but because I’ve felt very restless and really quite bored however I can no longer sit at my desk and write for periods of time without getting uncomfortable. Walking around outside with no access to a toilet and not being able to keep up with my daughter is all just becoming a bit more frustrating. I have had to come to terms with the fact that I can no longer keep up with my own old pace and that has been difficult. However, on the plus side Baby F will be here at some point in the next six weeks, I am just one week away from being considered full term and everything we need is ready in our home. Have a read of my 34 weeks pregnancy update here if you want to see how I’ve been getting on before this week!

Today I am going to start eating six dates a day as apparently that can help speed up the first stage of labour. I’m also upping the amount of raspberry leaf tea in drinking as apparently that can help speed up the second or pushing stage of labour. I don’t know how much truth there is to these things but it’s worth giving them a go for sure. I am also going to try listening to my hypnobirthing tracks at least once a day to help me relax and of course prepare better for birth. I am seeing my Doula next week and we are going to try out some positioning too.

36 Week Midwife Check

I am now seeing my midwife every two weeks until 40 weeks and then I imagine I will have a 41 week check too. Our due date is 21st September but as Evie was born at 42 weeks I estimate this baby will be born after 41 weeks too so I am asking friends and family not to ask “is the baby here yet” because we honestly won’t forget to tell people when he’s born. Being constantly asked is just going to make me feel stressed and it is very unlikely he will be here on or before his due date. I am feeling myself become more drawn in to myself now and not really wanting to make any plans that take me too far from home.

My midwife did all the usual checks except fundal height measurement because we had a growth scan yesterday and it looks like he is currently weighing in around 7llbs9 which is now raising concerns as he’s also along the 95th centile. Evie, however was measuring on the 90th centile during my growth scans and was then born on the 35th centile. It also gets harder to measure the bigger you are and closer to the end you are. We have had a long discussion about the best place to birth now because the biggest risk factor is shoulder dystocia and that is a very real concern. I had a conversation with my consultant over the phone about it and I’m now in two minds about whether I will continue at home or attempt a VBAC in hospital in the most homely environment I can possibly create.

I have had no signs at all of impending labour and I’m not expecting any until we reach that 40 week mark. He is still head down, moving well and growing. He is laying on the left side and the midwife doesn’t think he will shift position. Our next appointment will be at 37+5 days where we will talk a bit more about the best place to birth. I’m going to discuss it more with my Doula when I next see her and go from there too. It’s hard because I really want to have a positive experience and I do feel like I would feel better at home but ultimately I don’t want any harm to come to either of us. There are still a lot of positives I can take from a hospital VBAC it would just mean I can’t use the pool which is something I am okay with. We also talked about likelihood of the length of labour and that actually he might come quite quickly as my established labour stage from 4cm-10cm with the syntocinon drip took around five hours which is actually pretty quickly for the drip. This pregnancy is becoming a bit complicated because there is so many risks that we just can’t accurately assess.

Antenatal Classes

We are booked in to do the NHS run Confident Birthing class tomorrow and we are going to an antenatal breastfeeding information session on Monday.

For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.

August 24, 2018
What I’ll Be Using to Help Me Breastfeed & Express

I’ve openly talked about how much I want to breastfeed Baby F when he turns up and I thought it was time to show you a few breastfeeding essentials that I’ve been putting together over the last few months and I’m hoping that with these essentials my breastfeeding journey will allow me to feed with confidence. Whilst I really want to breastfeed exclusively and I will actively be trying to do so I feel much more confident having a few things in the home to help with expressing because ultimately I would rather my baby have breastmilk than formula so I’m prepared to do whatever I can. Hopefully we will establish breastfeeding, a good latch and my baby will thrive however I know a lot more know than I did then and I’m much more prepared for feeding in the night, cluster feeding and have done my research on how I might want to try and boost my supply. Breastfeeding works on a supply and demand basis so the more I feed him the more milk I make and I plan to continue feeding for as long as possible.

I think this does put a lot of pressure on me however, actually, when I think about it I won’t be putting pressure on myself to do anything else, especially for the first six weeks. As long as Evie gets to and from school and he is fed, other things and other people can wait. I think there is one film I might want to see in late November but other than that I have no intention of planning on leaving him overnight until he finishes breastfeeding completely. I’ve already had offers of babysitting but I think people often forget that it’s much harder if a baby is breastfed. I’m not expecting, or asking, for any “time off” whilst he feeds from me and I won’t just give him a bottle for the sake of giving him a bottle if I don’t need to.

I’ve put together a list of things I’ll be using to help me with breastfeeding, and, if I do feel the need to express, we have those in the home too.

Breastmilk Storage Bags

One thing I am a little worried about is feeding in public because I have big boobs and I don’t want to be subjected to horrible comments. I have no intention of doing so until I am confident feeding in my own home anyway and can do it without a mountain of cushions and once breastfeeding is established, if Baby F does take a bottle then I can build up a supply and freeze if for feeds outside the home. These storage bags can be popped in the freezer for 6 months or in the fridge for 24 hours. You pop the date on and mark how much milk it contains.

Affiliate Link: https://amzn.to/2KwxVMi

Kit & Kin Breast Balm

This is to help with those tough days of cracked bleeding nipples. I experienced that before with Evie and it was really horrid. The first two weeks are hard and hurt so anything I can use to just make those first feeds a little more comfortable are absolute essentials. The Kit and Kin Breast Balm is full of natural and nourishing ingredients, safe to use when breastfeeding and without harsh chemicals making it an ideal choice and a great price at £7.99

Boobix Supply Boosting Cookies

I saw a blogger friend of mine using these Boobix Lactaction cookies to help give her supply a boost and decided to buy some to pack into my hospital bag. Boobix are cookies that are full of ingredients that help boost your breastmilk supply and I’ve been told they’re absolutely delicious. At £10 a box I won’t be sharing them and I’m hoping eating one or two cookies a day in the first week will really help us get off to a good start with breastfeeding. Plus, if I do begin to express then I will need to do what I can to continue ensuring I have a great supply and if eating cookies helps me then I’m willing to take one for the team. You can make your own if you’re creative enough and I might give it a go but I am no baker. Boobix are basically Lactation Cookies are cookies that contain galactagogues, or ingredients, that can help maintain or increase your breast milk supply.

The B-Shirt

I love my gorgeous summer coloured B Shirt which is really going to help me feed with confidence. I got a size 20 and started wearing in pregnancy despite being quite a bit bigger but this top felt comfortable over my bump so the sizing is lovely and comfortably generous without feeling baggy. The BShirt is a great too having a flap that you lift giving baby direct access to the breast. It also looks really stylish on and there are loads of really lovely colours available too. This is a perfect staple for post natal clothing as it’s comfortable and has that all important accessibility for breastfeeding. There are lots of colours available too and I might treat myself to a few more over the months. I am really keen to find clothing that helps me feel less exposed yet makes feeding easy for me.

Reusable Breast Pads

I’ve previously blogged about wanting to use more reusable items, being more eco friendly and finding cost effective ways for my family to use certain products. Reusable bamboo breast pads are going to be an absolute essential. Lovely and soft, washable and easy to pop into a nursing bra. I sleep on my front so I’m expecting a bit of leakage in the night too so any extra protection is really going to help.

Affiliate Link: https://amzn.to/2IqB9o4

Nursing Bras for Day and Night

I’ve finally found some nursing bras thanks to Bravado Designs. I bought two in XL which actually fit me, are comfortable and have no underwire but still offer support. I feel like I’m on to a total winner. Nursing bras are an essential if you’re planning on feeding yourself and you might need a few for day and night use. They will basically be the bras you wear for pretty much all of your breastfeeding life and, if like me, you’re top heavy and can’t go braless then I really recommend Bravado Designs who have a great selection.

Affiliate Link: https://amzn.to/2we75TH

Lansinoh Single Electric Breast Pump

I had a manual pump with Evie and it did absolutely nothing for me so this time I’ve decided to go with an electric pump this time around to, hopefully, make expressing a bit easier for me.

Disclaimer: I received the electric breast pump. The B-Shirt and breast balm to include in this feature and the other items I purchased myself to try. All opinions remain my own.

August 23, 2018
The Best Hypnobirthing Resources

Hypnobirthing is new to me in this pregnancy but something I am becoming quickly obsessed with. Hypnobirthing is helping me to conquer my anxiety, relax better during my pregnancy and getting really excited about the birth of Baby F which really isn’t very far away now. I’ve talked openly about this with my Doula who has even said that she has seen those that follow the techniques and recordings really positive birth experiences no matter what happens. For me it’s all about having the confidence to handle whatever situation, to cope better during labour and birth and to make my birth as positive as I possibly can.

What Is Hypnobirthing?

Hypnobirthing is a toolkit of information, techniques and exercises to help you have a positive birth. Some people feel it’s too “hippy” for them and that’s completely fine but there is actually loads of evidence based scientific research that really supports hypnobirthing and the positive affects it can have on women when they go into labour and birth their babies.

Hypnobirthing is all about positive reinforcement, deep relaxation and getting your mind into the best state for labour. It can help relieve pain, has helped women avoid too much intervention and can help you prepare for whatever birth you are planning on having. It helps to tackle the fear surrounding birth and empower women with knowledge and confidence.

Where Can I Start with Hypnobirthing?

Hypnobirthing is all about practise so starting soon in your pregnancy can be really beneficial however some women do look into it in the very late stages of pregnancy and still find hypnobirthing really beneficial to their birth and labour experience.

I would first recommend listening or reading some positive birth stories. I found YouTube a good place to start with this as well as Tell Me A Good Birth Story. Avoid highly dramatised shows full of tension like One Born Every Minute which are often not full of positive births. I found that the more positive stories I read the more confidence I had that I could also have a positive birth and so many of these women mentioned how much they loved hypnobirthing. I really recommend Lynn JT on YouTube who has a six step video series on the basics of hypnobirthing as a place to find more information and get started.

Free Hypnobirthing Courses

There is a free trial available on the introduction to hypnobirthing here which is another great place to get a snapshot into what you can learn by taking a hypnobirthing course or class. It doesn’t give you all the information but is another great starting point.

You can also look for a Confident Birthing or midwife lead Hypnobirthing class at your local birth centre or hospital. I am attending one on 25th August and as it’s run by the NHS it’s thankfully free. These classes book up fast so book in early as there is usually a waiting list.

Hypnobirthing Books To Read

Online Hypnobirthing Course

I have absolutely loved the Digital Pack available from The Positive Birthing Company. It’s a series of fantastic videos that explains everything you need to know about labour, birth, inductions and how hypnobirthing can help every scenario. There are over 40+ videos, a private positive birth story community, a guide on writing your birth preferences plan as well as relaxation scripts. The homebirthing course pack is a fantastic resource to download and hand over to partners too so they can read through everything and learn loads. The videos are short and easy to binge watch. You can watch them with a partner, they teach techniques and are really informative and interesting. Just watching the videos and listening to where I can find out more information has helped me to make informed decisions.

Deep Relaxation Hypnobirthing Recordings

Having private hypnobirthing sessions and buying the digital pack I have loads of relaxation recordings to listen to including one that has been personalised with my own birth affirmations. There are also plenty of hypnobirthing recordings available on YouTube and some of the books I have purchased have included links to pregnancy affirmations, birth affirmations and a deep relaxation recording too. The point is to listen to these as often as you can so that the message gets through to your subconscious giving you loads of positive reinforcement. If you are keen to get the labour process started then deep relaxation is a great place to start as it can really help get the Oxytocin flowing through you.

Private Hypnobirthing Sessions

I had two sessions with Positively You Hypnotherapy. Mandy came to my home as she was quite local and went through a fantastic presentation on birth and how hypnobirthing can really help including scientific evidence, breathing techniques, pain relief visualisations, positive reinforcement and relaxation recordings to keep and listen to before and during labour. It was lovely having the private sessions because these helped us get to know Mandy on a one-to-one basis. She listened and answered all our questions and went through absolutely everything in no rush.

Creating a Hypnobirthing Playlist

You can create a playlist for your labour and birth on YouTube or a music app depending on what you are looking for. I have found putting lots of hypnobirthing relaxation recordings together in one place is helping me to keep getting that positive message through and keeping the ones I like in a nice easy to access place. However, some women like to create music playlists to help Oxytocin flow, keep them at peace and relaxed throughout labour and birth.

My Experience with Hypnobirthing

I am hoping to update this part with my experience of using the techniques learned when I have had Baby F. For my pregnancy though hypnobirthing has helped me to relax, have a great night sleep and given me confidence in my body because as they say knowledge is power.

For more pregnancy content please head to my hub post which contains links to all my relevant pregnancy based blog posts. My second High Bmi Pregnancy.

August 22, 2018