I first starting playing FFXIV in May 2021 so technically it’s been over two years since I began and my character has been through a fair amount of changes during that time. I have been through a fair amount of changes in that time in my personal life as well so it’s been kind of a mixed bag. FFXIV was never a game I was really interested but being one of the lucky few to manage to secure getting a PS5 back then and in the midst of a global pandemic I thought it would be a good idea to try.
I’ve written a few blog posts on my time playing FFXIV because in those two years this game has taken up a huge portion of my life. I’ve tried to do a lot of things from doing the obvious main scenario quests to joining FC’s to housing, crafting and raiding. Some of that has been more successful than others. The biggest difference was someone like me, a usually solo gamer that had a lot of love for other Final Fantasy games, trying to play an MMORPG. The social aspect of the game was daunting enough for me to google ‘how much can I solo whilst playing FFXIV’ and it turns out quite a lot.
Playing FFXIV as a Sprout on Louisoix
I had no idea why I ended up on Louisoix as my server of choice but I am glad that I did because it’s what has allowed me to make the friends I have made whilst playing FFXIV. Originally thinking I wanted to play as a Viera because of Fran from FFXII and finding a very limited amount of hairstyles actually lead me to creating my character as a maximum height AuRa because they looked like small dragons. She had pink hair and my starting job as an arcanist dictated my starting city as Limsa Lominsa which I have since learned has a reputation for being a place for a lot of very interesting conversations.
I knew absolutely nothing about this game at all. I was playing FFXIV on console and found the controls to be confusing. I didn’t know how to access other parts of my UI – the chat box for one – and I didn’t really know what to do. This lead to me basically opening up a lot of quests at once and becoming very overwhelmed. I thought why not try and level my character out in the wilds of La Noscea when I was quested with killing some ladybirds for my job role quest but didn’t understand how job specific abilities worked for a long time and instead would just press ‘square’ and then ‘attack’. Auto-attack damage in this game is not very good, your abilities actually make quite a difference I have since found out.
I remember one morning at about 11am I was trying to enter the first dungeon which, at the time, didn’t have duty support and I had absolutely no luck getting in to it as an arcanist DPS player. So I once again turned to google of which the answer to beating dungeon queue’s was to do so as a tank or a healer. Healing still to this day does not appeal to me and so my option was left to tank. More googling leads to ‘Marauder’ is a tank class in FFXIV which also started in Limsa Lominsa so I went back and I picked up that job and I decided okay well I guess back to levelling again which meant back to killing ladybirds. Although, not auto attacking. I did thankfully do that with my abilities.
Tanking gets you into dungeons faster but maybe learn what that means first…
I will say right now, as a non-sprout and official holder of a burger king mentor crown that I am in August 2023 a fairly competent tank. I say this because potentially some of the below will instill fear and terror as you read what I was like and that I truly understand to my very core what Tankxiety is like when playing FFXIV. I know what it is like to be put off tanking and I feel like I should offer some reassurance that, whilst I make mistakes plenty of times, I am now confident enough to tank most content in this game, that I did get better. We all, however, start somewhere and this is how my decision to beat dungeon queue’s didn’t go as well as I would have liked at first.
My knowledge of being a ‘tank’ class was literally they have more defense than others. It wasn’t ‘I should be leading the charge’ in a dungeon and taking all of the damage and excuse me but what the fuck is emnity and why do I want it? Did I do the ‘hall of novice’ quests before attempting any dungeons? No…absolutely not. I didn’t even have half of my abilities because I didn’t know they were locked behind job quests until I eventually went back to them towards the end of A Realm Reborn were I was well over level 40. I even did the unthinkable shame inducing thing of entering a dungeon without having my jobstone saved on my gearset.
There were, I think, three very specific occasions that taught me to be a better tank on my then chosen main class which started as Marauder and then specialises into Warrior at level 30. The first was the gauntlet for any sprout tank or healer known as Aurum Vale in which some very kind and helpful player literally told me how to use tank stance and what I was supposed to do as a tank in a non condescending way. The second actually was one of the things that lead me to stop playing the job and seriously looking for a DPS class to change to instead and that was being told how stupid I was for using Holmgang at the start of the fight. To which, yes, it is retrospectively a stupid thing to do. Because what I was doing was just pressing ALL my mitigation buttons on cooldown. That was, indeed, not correct.
The third occasion was when I was finally confident enough to learn how to play Warrior properly and try again after finishing the MSQ at level 80 and going on to play my favoured and main job now, Machinist -which has become a running joke to myself really I do play well enough to sometimes steal enmity and thus, tank without any of those defensive buffs, or if a tank dies, I am often high enough on the enmity list to be the next one to unintentionally provoke the boss. Anyway, the third occasion was what I fondly think of as a Warrior masterclass from someone in my free company at the time that did actually know what they were doing and spent a good portion of an afternoon helping me.
Speaking of joining a Free Company…
I have now been in four free companies since I started playing FFXIV. The first one I was in for well over a year, if not around 14 months after a randomly thrown invite way back in my ARR days. I remember accepting the invite and then seeing welcome messages popping up in the chat box which before then had been silent and kind of ignored so I didn’t know how to type in it and didn’t really ever say anything but did start seeing the same names creep up often enough that I began to get a sense of familiarity. Eventually, I think about two weeks later, I accidentally pressed the gamepad button on my controller which did get me into the chat box and I saw I was able to bring up a keyboard and did say hello and explained that I didn’t know how before and which probably made me come across very scatterbrained.
I used many a wrong abbreviation for things when I thought people were talking about things but they actually weren’t. One occasion being asking for help with DR – because I thought that meant ‘duty roulette’ not ‘Delebrum Reginae’ which is something that was relevant at the time and something people did weekly that I didn’t know about or even have unlocked. Three people agreed but it wasn’t until it clicked with someone that I wasn’t asking for actual DR content who explained to me what delebrum reginae actually was. Two of those people did stick with me and do a levelling dungeon because I was trying to get my machinist levelled enough to carry on with the main scenario quests at that point. The other person promptly left which is completely understandable but did leave me feeling pretty embarrassed.
There were several other occasions like this. I was eager to do a lot of content and events that the Free Company I was in put up but I didn’t really know how to be a competent player. I didn’t know how to play my jobs. I had not, in fact, read my tool tips. I think my incompetence but willing to join in kind of nature sort of gave people the impression that I was a bit ditzy and maybe even made people feel a bit sorry for me. The thing is at the time I didn’t know I was doing the wrong things and when someone did tell me I was horribly mortified. Eventually though I learned a lot from the first free company I was in and I did a lot of fun things.
I did current level extreme trials and I was there experiencing all the hype with everyone during Endwalker’s release. I made friends, I attended in game weddings, I was invited to social events and in game parties. I had my own in game wedding too, which was a lot of fun. My friend and I decided to gift everyone with Morbol Seedlings which involved us chasing people around the chapel to give them something no one wanted. I was able to get my first taste of savage raiding with an FC static and I will tell you savage is an entirely different ball game to other content in FFXIV. I even lead my own events as an experienced player to help other people get clears on particular content.
Leaving an FC can be a really hard thing to do…
In the end, however, I did decide to move on from that Free Company. Initially I didn’t have much of a desire to join another as by that point I had joined a different static to do savage raiding with and I was kind of content to have some time away from an FC. However, one day out in the wild I was approached by another FC leader and did decide to give it a go. I am in that free company now and have been for some months but in the interim between joining last October and now I did end up changing servers and being part of my statics FC on Spriggan for a month. I then came back with the desire to start my own FC with some friends but it just wasn’t really the right thing for me to do.
I still have that FC on my Alt so I do get to learn how to do FC workshop stuff and still have everything set up so if we decided to give it another go in the future we could do. However I ended up returning to the Free Company I am part of now and an officer in so I have a level of responsibility and do get to join in and put on my own events.
…But I hope I’ve made some lifelong friends
There are people I speak to on a very regular basis and feel I’ve got to know well. As someone that was incredibly nervous about the social aspect when it came to playing FFXIV I’m glad I have tried to make friends. What may have started as helping out over time became gradually getting to know others better and in some cases has given me a chance to find other games through recommendations. It’s been fun just hanging out in game and showing off glamour to each other, it’s been nice to just have a chat amongst the content.
So what now?
I remember the launch up towards Endwalker really fondly and reading about everyone’s theories and excitement gave me a real buzz as a first time experiencing an expansion release. With FFXIV Dawntrail now being confirmed as releasing in Summer 2024 I do feel like it would be good tidy up a few things and step back a little so I can come back into the expansion feeling a lot less burned out. I wasn’t expecting such an emotional ride both in terms of gameplay and friendships. I wasn’t really expecting any form of personal development either which probably came alongside my Autism and ADHD diagnosis alongside the friends I’ve made who have been there for me.
So for now I’m going to step back from doing savage raiding and focus on the Endwalker extremes, a little bit of older relic farming and finally getting my Master Culinarian achievement.
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