I am new to the works of VE Schwab this year and have only read two of her books so far but I have loved them both and can see why these books are favourited by so many people. I first read A Darker Shade of Magic earlier in the year and I am currently reading A Gathering of Shadows which is my 52nd book of the year – completing my reading challenge for 2020. Honestly, book boxes have really helped with my reading as well as being more active on bookstagram. Also my youtube is picking up nicely again so I’m hoping to do more bookish chats, reviews and unboxings which I cross post here, on IGTV and occassionally facebook. Anyway, I digress. If you fancy seeing an unboxing of the special edition Illumicrate Collections of A Darker Shade of Magic box you can below:
What’s Inside Illumicrate Collections: A Darker Shade of Magic
An illumicrate exclusive naked hardback edition of the first book A Darker Shade of Magic with foil cover design, exclusive end papers and shiny silver sprayed edges with ribbon bookmark. A set of dust jackets for all three books A hanging poster A set of acrylic character models An enamel pin A reversible book sleeve with art on one side and a quote on the other A giant Four London’s blanket
Firstly, this box is bigger than the regular monthly boxes and this is my first special edition illumicrate box. I have already ordered the Daughter of Smoke and Bone box for November but now I’ve seen the quality of stuff in the ‘luxe’ collectors editions I feel that this will just be next level. Also, there’s a blanket and I love a blanket. It’s incredibly soft and lovely. The artwork is all stunning too, I am so impressed and so happy to own these items. I love the booksleeve as the quote art is fantastic and the character art is just perfect. The character figures was a really cool touch and something I just didn’t see coming at all, a great way to display character art.
For the last maybe year or so our bed has become more and more broken. Slats have slipped out and snapped. It’s gotten so bad recently that Adam is mostly sleeping on the broken sofa in the living room and I have a pile of various things under the bed trying to support the mattress. In fact we are considering just getting rid of the frame altogether and sleeping on the mattress on the floor for the time being. We wanted to get one and then lockdown happened and it’s been a bit of an issue, as we needed to dismantle and get rid of the old frame as well as get the new bed built but these services are only just back up and running again.
I’m not opposed to buying second hand. This bed was originally new but a display model so was on sale. We’ve had it over seven years, and the frame was probably being tested in store for a while. The only issue with second hand is not having a van to get it here or to get rid of the old one. It’s something we’d have to work out.
Buying a bed is expensive, but it’s absolutely the mattress that puts the price up. It’s worth looking for a mattress sale to get a good quality mattress for your bed, you don’t have to buy the bed and mattress together if you have found a great price elsewhere. Mattress sale uk has been a good source of information for reviewing mattresses. I’ve got the Leesa mattress myself and have had this since I was pregnant with Felix so it’s only a few years old and still going strong. Thankfully we just need a new bed frame.
Being two bigger people and sharing a room with a cot bed means we are limited in space. We need a king size frame to fit the mattress and I’ve been considering ottoman storage beds. Being in a flat with little storage space means we need under the bed storage but I feel like an ottoman bed would keep things nice and neat.
Now Evie is going to her dads regularly again our plan is to get Felix to spend the afternoon with Nanny so we can dismantle the bed and clear everything out to make space to build the new bed. We can get that done over a weekend. With a clear space in the room it’s a good excuse to shift some stuff from the cupboards in the room too and have a good declutter of stuff we don’t need or use. Then we can focus on getting a new frame set up and hopefully a better night sleep.
Felix is of the age now where, if he had his own room, I’d be changing things around a little bit to update his would be nursery to a toddler approved bedroom. I think there are a few things that you can keep the same from baby to teen to enable seamless transitions as your child gets older. Then with each stage or room makeover only a few things need changing rather than a complete overhaul.
Wood flooring can help with this because you can just style a room with a rug which is more fitting for the child’s age and interests. I know toddlers can be a little accident prone so if you’re worried about falling out of the bed onto hard flooring then a rug near the bed and a bed guard can help put your mind at ease. We purposely got a cot to cotbed where we could remove one of the sides for Felix as that would help with the transition from toddler to bigger bed when we move and he gets his own room.
Keeping the walls clear and a neutral colour can really help and can be decorated with wall stickers, peel and stick murals, frames and prints for a bit of colour. Again these can be replaced or reframed as a child gets older and peel and stick wall stickers can add a bit of personality to the place. Whilst big, bold colours can look great if you want to redecorate and paint over a dark colour it’s going to take longer and increase the amount of work you need to do to change a room. Also, if you’re in rented accomodation and can’t decorate wall stickers are usually safe as they don’t damage the walls and can be removed easily.
Fun, colourful storage can hold toys through the childhood years but can be repurposed for older children and teenagers for their interests and hobbys. The can be passed down to other children or used in other various places around the house. These are usually relatively cheap and easy to replace should they break or get damaged but I’ve found if treated well for storage can last years.
The recent Government campaign insists that weight loss is the answer to health, but this is problematic, fat shaming, poverty shaming and only focuses on eating less junk food. This, with the recent “obese people may have to sheild” come Autumn without addressing food desert areas, nutrition, movement and childrens’ access to meals and cooking skills is ignored. It is complicated. This is long.
*Obesity is a slur. It is used to health shame fat people regardless of activity, general health & diet and is assumed the person is stupid, lazy and has no willpower. It does not take into any consideration of the socioeconomics. Fat, whilst often used as an insult, is a neutral word and does not actually connote ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
Slimming Clubs don’t want you to drink smoothies even though they are a great breakfast on the go and give you a portion of fruit/veg
Before we get into this lets completey ignore the governement ‘Eat Out to Help Out’ scheme in August which is not going to be all about making healthy choices…If I’m going to go to Pizza Express or Nandos for a half priced meal I won’t be ordering a salad, and if I do, I’ll be covering it in dressing. So running these two ‘schemes’ alongside each other is a load of crap. Here are my issues.
I’ve seen every bloody argument for and against this faphobic rethoric and it’s just a load of shit. I won’t deny I’m worried about catching covid (again?) risking being on a ventilator and dying because I am fat but as Rebelfit excellently said, it’s not fatness, it’s not weight that brings vulnerable, elderly and obese (obese is a slur – it is always meant to health shame fat people) people into the same at risk group. It is more likely to be poor(er) cardiovascular health. Improving your aerobic fitness is going to be the healthier option to weight loss.
Better Health – Lose 5lb to “save the NHS” is massively stimatising. It should be about movement.
Losing weight takes time and energy and effort and it’s hard. Diets fail 90% of the time and loosing 5lbs for a fat person isn’t going to make much difference. Do you know what will? Movement. Not saying starve yourself. Not stopping bofoff offers on chocolate. Not banning adverts. None of that will work BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL STILL BUY THESE THINGS WHEN THEY WANT THEM and people will order what they want to eat in a resturant regardless of calories – but they’ll probably feel shitty about it afterwards so let’s just drive more people into harmful hating themselves, eating disorders, guilt and stress, more anxiety based behaviours and not moving because they’re so afraid of being made fun of for being a fat person moving.
Why can’t the money go to families for free fruit and veg vouchers? Why can’t the money go to discounted swimming lessons or gym memberships instead of slimming clubs? Why is it ‘lose 5 pounds’ not ‘why not start moving for an extra 15 minutes a day’? Why can’t the money go to local authorities in schools to teach kids how to cook so they have the skills when they’re older? Or adult cooking classes? Or online cooking classes that can be done when someone is time poor? These schemes ignore the fact that poorer people, who are more likely to be fat people, or people that were poor growing up, may lack the money, time and skills to prepare freshly cooked food for every meal for their family.
it’s all about finding a way to move and exercise that you love and that feels good
Movement can benefit you almost instantly, weight loss will not. It takes months and years.
If you start moving more today, regardless of what you eat, in a week, month, years time you will feel stronger, fitter and healthier. You will have less pain. You will breathe better. You will feel better. Look at atheletes and rugby players who are clearly classed as Obese because of BMI and eat a shit load of calories a day…does anyone reckon they’re unfit? NO! Because they move every single day. They work out. They build muscle. They have nutritionists helping them know what to eat and when. They have the money and resources for healthier meals.
The issue is not weight, the issue is lack of movement. You do not have to be thin, or starve yourself to be healthy. You just have to move more often. Yes cooking from scratch, eating fruit and vegetables, eating a colourful plate, eating slower, having chocolate in moderation are all healthy choices but we are discounting the biggest thing and that is moving more. I’ve read the answer is for GP’s to prescribe bike rides and for some areas to get free bikes which is great for those that 1) can ride a bike (I can’t) 2) have a garden/shed to store bikes in (I don’t).
The money would be better spent getting people to move more in a way that is accessible to them
Slimming World don’t care about you, they just want your money and for you to keep coming back.
I don’t want to waste my time doing slimming world, eating food I can not stand, constantly being drained of energy from not eating enough, and being shamed for not losing weight weekly. I’d rather be encouraged to go swimming, which I absolutely love to do but struggle to afford it. We eat relatively well when we’re not eating in resturants or having takeaways. I love adding peppers and onions and fresh herbs to food to make them taste better. I love to cook. I like decent size meals. I don’t buy crisps & chocolate on a regular basis but I’m still fat from over 10 years of dieting and hating myself and binge eating. Now I’m undoing the damage from that.
My advice, don’t diet, just move more, let go of the guilt, stop calling foods ‘bad’ and ‘good and work on finding a meal plan that works for your needs and circumstances. This campaign is fat shaming and poor shaming. It won’t work except to drive people to get fatter in the long run. If you do have the time and don’t know how to cook then find some recipe books to try. Take a look at Jack Monroe’s book, which all started from a single parent trying to cook healthy meals using tins. It can be done, but we need the skills to do it, the appliances and the time.
The Better Health campaign is rife in classist views
Again we are facing not just an issue with fatness but an issue with class which is rife in this country and it frustrates me to no end. The government do not acknowledge people living in poverty and on the breadline. Let me outline for you. You have priveledge if:
You own a fridge, cooker and other kitchen appliances that allow you to store and cook food
You can regularly afford to top up/pay your gas and electric
You have a choice of where/what time you can shop
You can feed yourself and your family three meals a day, plus have stuff at home for snacks
You work a 9-5 job with a secure salaried wage and know when pay day is
You do not rely on foodboxes
You know how to cook and prepare fresh food
You have the time to cook meals every day
You have access to your own kitchen
You have/or are the partner that does this
Now I can tell you that I tick most of the above boxes right now but I haven’t always. I have had to rely on food boxes, I have had to share a kitchen with six other families. I have had to only have one draw in a freezer and one shelf in the fridge. I have lacked the time and skills. And if you think that there are families who don’t have access to some or all of the above then you, my friend, are blinded by your priveledge. Some of the families that don’t have all of the above will struggle with what you think is easy so please stop putting shame on them.
Some of these families might rely heavily on meal deals, takeaways, ready made food, microwave meals because they can’t/don’t have the facility to cook and a lot of these options are high fat, high sugar and highly processed. This, and an inability to move more regularly lead to gaining fat. It isn’t because they’re binge eating chocolate and crisps every occasion they can.
But Fruit IS Cheaper…Let’s Unpack That Poverty Shaming Statement
Also, I keep seeing the argument that fresh fruit/veg is cheaper and I want to break that down because, in the long term, it isn’t and I saw an excellent analogy by a counciler dad on facebook which I will loosely paraphrase.
A bag of apples is, say £1, for four apples. That’s pretty cheap or the same as a multipacket of crisps. The bag of apples will be a snack for four people, or one person 4 times in a week. But one apple isn’t filling, and one apple isn’t enough fruit and veg a day, let alone a week. We are told that to be healthy we need 5-7 portions of different coloured fruit and veg every day. So lets add strawberries for £2, a bunch of bananas for £1, a packet of spinach for £2, some cauliflower for £2 and a pack of peppers for £2. Including the apples, thats £10, for a family of four and is what you need per day. So adding that up becomes £70 a week just on fresh fruit and vegetables. Thats no rice, no pasta, no herbs, no stock cupboard ingredients, no lentils, no potatoes, and the most expensive thing, no meat. That’s no snacks, no bread, no packed lunch ingredients (well maybe one) no drinks. So lets add that in.
Lets add some chicken for £5, a pack of mince for £4, ham for £2, cheese for £2, milk for the week £2, two loaves of bread for £2, some juice for £1, pasta for £1, Rice for £1, a bag of potatoes for £2, some cereal for £2 and some yoghurts for £1. Thats another £25 and for a family of 4 thats maybe three meals and lunches a week. So it’s not enough for a weeks worth of meals, so you’ll likely have to double this and add extra to bulk out the meals with things like lentils, extra veg, beans, pulses etc. It’s easy then to arrive at something like £150 a week for food shopping for a family of four. That quickly transfers to £600 on food in a month.
Now I know what you’re thinking, why not shop somewhere cheaper. Aldi and Lidl are cheap. Yep, youre right, they are. But if a single, non driving parent doesn’t have one local, has no family to drive them to/from and can only carry so much by herself on the bus then that’s going to be a lot of trips back and fourth, resulting in more money spent on transport.
You could be thinking why don’t they just shop for the reduced meat that goes on sale every night in certain supermarkets – again, I hear you, this is an excellent way to save money, but if you’re working shifts, a single parent or not able to drive to/from a supermarket at this time then you’re going to miss out. All these sweeping statements are fine if you’re a single person or you have help with any caring responsibilities but they simply do not work for everyone. It’s complex and it isn’t one size fits all. You can’t just tell someone to do better if they do not have the resources to do better, or differently.
So a family might have to resort to buying all frozen food which is cheap and easy to prepare, providing they have an oven and the electricity/gas to use it. HFHS processed meals which lead to an increase in fatness are cheap, but will give every member of the family a hot meal each day.
The TL:DR version – to afford all nutrition food for a family of four you need to live close to a budget supermarket and be able to get there in time for the cheap fruit and veg boxes which are usually in working hours. And know and have the time to shop in the reduced section. And have transport if your closest shop is a small newsagents that doesn’t cover all your meal making needs/where the costs are spiked.
How To Improve Poverty Stricken Families Health & Wellbeing
This is what I think the government should do to help families on the breadline instead of funding repair a bike and diet club schemes.
Multi supermarket free fruit and vegetables vouchers
Reduced gym/swim/fitness memberships
Subsidised swimming lessons for children under 11
Free school meals for primary school children
Resources to get proper cooking lessons back in school for kids, including the ingredients needed
Making healthy food more accessible
Getting rid of zero hour contracts and giving job security back to people
If you are reading this and genuinely want to improve your health then I would really recommend reading more about anti diet culture, such as Health at Every Size which is a brilliant book full of recommendations, scientific studies and how diets don’t work. Improving your mental health, wellbeing and appreciating your body regardless of size will help. It’s also important to consider fat liberation movements. Rebelfit is another excellent place for information and non bias, non discrimatory fitness programmes which have lots of like minded people of all different shapes, sizes and abilities that want to move more and get healthier. Health and weight are two very seperate things. Sofie Hagen, a fat comedien who I love to follow on Instagram, is another great resource for this and has a pretty amazing book too.
Body Positivity isn’t about being fat, lazy and loving your body
No one in the fat liberation or body positive movement says this is only for fat people to be fat and lazy. I have never seen that anywhere. I have seen nothing but encouragement for fat people existing and taking up the spaces they deserve to have. I have seen a call for joyous movement, for yoga, for swimming for weight lifting and I have seen people genuinely love and appreciate their fat bodies. If it’s about health, then shouldn’t it be about all health?
Improving mental health by focusing on positive self talk
Moving more to improve cardio health
Eating foods that you enjoy and eating a range of foods that sustain you
Recovering from eating disorders which include binge eating and disordered eating
Taking the time for self care to improve your relationship with food and your body
Having therapy where you can exist as a fat person not to be told “if you just tried to lose weight”
Do you think we haven’t tried?
Also, I want to add as a final point this comment that “you can’t be fat and healthy.” In my experience this comes from a place of shame or disgust. It’s frustrating because, for women, it absolutely comes from a place that women are here to be objectified and sexualised and that comment comes from a place where men* (usually) don’t want to fuck a fatty. Because obviously, we fatties are so desperate because no one could possibly ever want us sexually in any way ever…and the fact that there are people that put divorce reasons as ‘she/he/they put on weight after we got married’ like a big fuck you to that. Fatness is not the problem, thinness should not be the goal. Ever. Make the goal to move more, to get strong, to be healthy but stop making it about weight loss.
It’s hot. It’s been a hot weekend and with children I am forever tidying, clearing away and cleaning up after them. Cleaning in hot weather is a nightmare and something I would like to try and make as fuss free as possible. Usually, being in a flat, you’d think it would be easy to keep clean and tidy but with a lack of storage space and a family of four who do not live with minamalist intentions means lots of clutter. I really need to do something about it.
I am absolutely the kind of person that hates and begrudges cleaning. I do not understand how people can get enjoyment out of it. I just end up with a bad back and a hot sweaty mess. Especially in this weather. I am all about making things as simple, quick and easy as possible which is why most of the flooring in my home is wooden. Engineered wood flooring is one such type that is easy to put together and is quick and easy to clean when you’d rather be cooling down in the pool. If only we had a garden so in the hot weather the kids could play outside and I wouldn’t have to keep clearing up after them!
I am slowly finding some great deals and tips on storage to help with the clutter. I have a few big jobs I really need to do such as sorting out our cupboards. We are, hopefully, finally, buying a new bed next month to replace our very broken frame. Our bedroom is one I need to attack and declutter next. It’s hard sharing a room with a toddler as his bed takes up a great deal of space but I’m hoping with a new bed where we can’t shove everything underneath the bed and hope no one see’s it again will reclaim the space in some way. It’s also an excellent chance to sort out everything in that room properly. Right now though, it’s way to hot to be stuck in that room amongst the clutter and get it done so I’ll stick with the smaller easier jobs.
